Category Archives: Dad’s Corner

Lonely? Be Encouraged! – Part 1

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A family writes and explains how they have no like-minded families with whom to fellowship. The families in their church are very worldly, and they aren’t able to spend quality time with them without wrong influences on their children. As I read the story, I sense a desperation for fellowship.

A mom writes that her husband is complacent about spiritual things. He takes no initiative in spiritually building up his family’s souls such as leading a nightly family Bible time. In addition, he allows the children to be involved in worldly activities such as watching TV and movies. The mom is deeply lonely for a like-hearted teammate with her same passion for following the Lord Jesus.

Another mom writes that her children desire to have friends. The problem is that those they know all seem to be from the “youth group scene” being entertainment and romance focused. What does she do with lonely children?

We have spoken with others who acknowledged they were desperate to get married because of their loneliness. Now they have a spouse, but they aren’t like-hearted, and they simply traded one form of loneliness for another form.

What if you had a terrible stomachache that had lasted two weeks? Undoubtedly you would like relief from the pain, but wouldn’t you really want to know the cause? Physical pain is a symptom of a physical problem. God designed our bodies so that pain would be a warning sign that something is wrong and needs our attention. One of the greatest problems of leprosy is that the nerves aren’t signaling pain when damage is occurring to the body. Hence, lepers will lose their fingers because they are damaging them but not feeling any pain. Pain is the body’s call for help.

I believe that loneliness is similar to pain in that it can be both very real in a person’s life and is symptomatic of a deeper problem. A person who is lonely can tell himself that it is only loneliness, and therefore it shouldn’t matter, but it often won’t go away unless the root cause is dealt with. I do believe the loneliness of those mentioned in the opening of this article to be real and troubling. With pain, one can usually take some form of pain medication, but what does one do with loneliness when there is no acceptable, masking solution? One can’t expect that like-hearted families, husbands, or friends will just miraculously appear.

So what’s the need in our lives of which loneliness is a symptom? The need is for a close, intimate relationship with Jesus Christ. When we are focusing on our loneliness, we are looking to others to provide for us what only God can and should provide. The Lord is to be our all in all, our every thing. David tells us that his expectation is in the Lord only. “My soul, wait thou only upon God; for my expectation is from him. He only is my rock and my salvation: he is my defence; I shall not be moved. In God is my salvation and my glory: the rock of my strength, and my refuge, is in God” (Psalms 62:5-7).

The Psalmist says, “Whom have I in heaven but thee? and there is none upon earth that I desire beside thee. My flesh and my heart faileth: but God is the strength of my heart, and my portion for ever” (Psalms 73:25-26). The Lord is the One on earth that he desires and Who gives him strength.

Oswald Chambers said in My Utmost for His Highest, “When once we get intimate with Jesus we are never lonely, we never need sympathy, we can pour out all the time without being pathetic.” The cure for loneliness is to draw closer to Jesus. Our peace can never be in other people because other people are not perfect and will always let us down. “Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid” (John 14:27).

As Jesus was leaving to return to the Father, He told His disciples that He would be with them always. He said, “Teaching them to observe all things whatsoever I have commanded you: and, lo, I am with you alway, even unto the end of the world. Amen” (Matthew 28:20). Through His Spirit, He comes to live in every one who has placed his faith in Him. Each believer always has Jesus Christ within him!

If that is true—and it is—then why would any believer ever feel lonely? The reality is that our day-to-day life involves this world. We work, we interact with others, and our focus is easily drawn to this world and those around us. It is all too easy to have an earthly focus and lose sight of the fact that Jesus is within us, and He is the One with Whom we most need fellowship.

This isn’t “pie-in-the-sky” Christianity, but true life in Christ, the way it is supposed to be. Some might be tempted to say, “Wait a minute. My relationship with Christ is good, but He isn’t real enough to me to keep me from being lonely.” Well, He should be! Jesus said in John 14:21, “He that hath my commandments, and keepeth them, he it is that loveth me: and he that loveth me shall be loved of my Father, and I will love him, and will manifest myself to him.” The Greek word for “manifest” means to reveal. The more we obey the Word, the more Jesus is made manifest to us.

I wouldn’t have much of a marriage if I didn’t spend time with Teri. We enjoy being together. Even when there have been times when we were easily irritated with each other, we found that the cure was to spend more time together. The more we are in the Word, the more we are praying, the more we set our hearts and minds on things above (Colossians 3), the more we obey, then the sweeter, the more dynamic, the more intimate our walk with Jesus becomes.

I also think many Christians have wrong expectations. They believe that they will have fellowship with other Christians of like heart, that there will be no persecutions, and that everyone will love them. This is not the life that Jesus promised us. “Then said Jesus unto his disciples, If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me” (Matthew 16:24). The cross could be very lonely indeed if it wasn’t for Jesus being with us. “And ye shall be hated of all men for my name’s sake: but he that endureth to the end shall be saved” (Matthew 10:22). That neither sounds pleasant nor popular.

“Enter ye in at the strait gate: for wide is the gate, and broad is the way, that leadeth to destruction, and many there be which go in thereat: Because strait is the gate, and narrow is the way, which leadeth unto life, and few there be that find it” (Matthew 7:13-14). When we are not following the broad and popular worldly path, Jesus is telling us that on the narrow path there will be fewer for us to fellowship with on that journey. There should be no surprise if our neighbors and those we work with think we are crazy. In addition, it may even be professing Christians in church who also don’t understand us and are not like-hearted.

God’s men were not popular. We can expect that the more we are like Christ, the more those of this world will not appreciate being with us. The worldly and religious both rejected Jesus, and they will reject us as well. Moses, Abraham, Daniel, Elijah, Elisha, Jeremiah, the minor prophets, John the Baptist, and Jesus were lonely as far as earthly friends go. They took their fellowship with the Father, will we? “That I may know him, and the power of his resurrection, and the fellowship of his sufferings, being made conformable unto his death; If by any means I might attain unto the resurrection of the dead” (Philippians 3:10-11).

Worldly Friends – Part 5

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This month we will conclude our discussion of how to teach our children to love the sinner but hate the sin without having a condemning attitude toward the worldly person. Here is the link to the first four articles in this series.

Last month we began looking into the book of Jude for direction concerning how we as parents are to interact with those who are worldly around us. This is not only important in our lives but also in our children’s because our children will model what we do. If we don’t want them to have worldly friends then we won’t be able to have them either. So how does Jude teach us to be in the world, be around the worldly, and yet not led away from our Lord? There are several things that are key, and we will break up the verses in Jude to discuss them.

First, we read that we must be in prayer. “But ye, beloved, building up yourselves on your most holy faith, praying in the Holy Ghost” (Jude 20). We are to be in serious prayer as we encounter the worldly. We have already seen how the relationship isn’t to be a friendship. Prayer is first because we recognize the frailty of our ability to protect ourselves: therefore, we cry out for the Lord’s strength and protection. We need to be aware of the danger we are in if we are trying to restore or win a worldly man.

In Jude 21a, he is telling us to “Keep yourselves in the love of God.” We keep ourselves in the love of God by obeying Him. “For this is the love of God, that we keep his commandments: and his commandments are not grievous” (1 John 5:3). To know His commandments, we must be in the Word. Every family member should be individually reading his Bible every morning and then come together as a family to read every evening. As we are in the Word, we learn His Word, it comes to mind through the day to direct us, and then we must choose to obey it.

In Jude 21b we now are told the secret of not condemning those who are worldly but whom we would be called to exhort. Look at this phrase with me, “looking for the mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ unto eternal life.” As we live our lives in Christ, serving Him every day, we look toward His mercy. We are to be constantly aware of our failures, and how we need, but don’t deserve, God’s mercy. When we remind ourselves of how pitiful we are before the Lord Jesus, we see that we have no room to condemn anyone else.

“This is a faithful saying, and worthy of all acceptation, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners; of whom I am chief” (1 Timothy 1:15). Here was God’s Apostle to the Gentiles describing himself as the greatest sinner of all. He wasn’t excusing sin in his life by way of grace, but he saw how far short he fell and was constantly aware of his wicked past.

“For I am the least of the apostles, that am not meet to be called an apostle, because I persecuted the church of God. But by the grace of God I am what I am: and his grace which was bestowed upon me was not in vain; but I laboured more abundantly than they all: yet not I, but the grace of God which was with me” (1 Corinthians 15:9-10). Paul is demonstrating to us the secret Jude shared in how we reach the worldly, protect ourselves, and not judge them at the same time.

As we remind ourselves of our past, we are all the more grateful for God’s mercy and grace, desiring not to return to our previous way of life again. Those memories also stir in us compassion for others still trapped in sin and or worldliness. “And of some have compassion, making a difference” (Jude 22). I’m often moved to compassion for others when the phrase comes to mind, “Except for the grace of God, there go I.” Every one of us is capable of extreme worldliness and sin. Therefore who are we to judge another? Each will have a judge, and that is the Lord Jesus. Until then, we do all we can to reach and help them.

In Jude 23 we now have the key to protect ourselves from falling into worldliness and sin, “And others save with fear, pulling them out of the fire; hating even the garment spotted by the flesh.” First we observe in this verse, that the goal of our interactions with the worldly is to bring them to repentance. Next the Holy Spirit via Jude is telling us that we must hate what has trapped others. The Greek word “hate” means just that. We are to so utterly detest what ensnared the worldly that we don’t want to get close to it. It isn’t enough that we dislike worldly activities. We must hate them and teach our children to hate those things as well.

One example of something I despise is the TV. Many families are ensnared by the trap of loving to be entertained by it and are thus influenced by it. The only way to protect my children from that trap is to teach my family to hate the TV. “I will set no wicked thing before mine eyes: I hate the work of them that turn aside; it shall not cleave to me” (Psalms 101:3). I don’t condemn the families caught in the trap. My heart aches for them because they are addicted to the TV (beast). So many families are being infected, and they can’t break free from the worst worldly friend their children (and parents for that matter) can have—the TV!!! Therefore, I am teaching my family a disdain for TV by pointing out to them the wickedness found therein, the time that they waste, and the outcomes in the lives of families who are ensnared by it.

Since last month’s Corner I have received a few e-mails that asked how what I have shared in this series is applied when the worldly “friend” is actually a worldly relative. The danger is just as real with extended family as it is with other friends. As a matter of fact, the more your child enjoys the worldly relatives, the greater the potential harm. What do you do when you don’t want to hurt or offend your relatives, but you feel the need to set boundaries? Ask yourself, “Am I willing to sacrifice my child for the sake of relationships with my extended family?” Considering we are commanded to bring our children up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord, we must choose to do what we should to follow the Lord Jesus. Therefore it will require some courage to take the stands with relatives that we might be forced to make if we want to keep our children’s hearts.

I had finished writing this article when I met a sixty-year-old man whose life story was the perfect but sad conclusion to this series. While I was waiting for him to complete some paperwork that I needed, I asked him where he would be in a million years. He said he would be dirt. I countered him by saying that certainly his body would be dirt, but where would he be?

Discerning where the conversation was going, he briefly described his childhood. He was raised by very conservative, Christian parents who went to church three times a week and read the Bible together every night after dinner. His folks didn’t drink or smoke, but he decided he wanted to do those things. Therefore, he hasn’t touched a Bible in many decades and has no interest in spiritual things. My heart was grieving for him and his parents when I summed it up like this. “So it is a personal preference—along the lines of your parents like vanilla but you like chocolate?” He smiled at me and said, “Exactly!”

I asked him what had happened when it sounded like he had the perfect Christian home? Did he have friends who led him the wrong way? He looked at me with an expression that said, “Now you got it.” And then verbally affirmed, “Exactly!” With a heavy heart I left him and wondered how parents could ever think that it wouldn’t matter if their children had worldly friends.

What about you? Have you learned to love the sinner by not condemning him but hating his sin? Are you teaching your children to do the same? Is your goal in a relationship with a worldly person to help him to a spiritual walk with the Lord Jesus? Do your children have worldly friends? There is much at stake in your answers to these questions—the spiritual future of your children. May I encourage you to evaluate your life and your example and make sure it is what the Lord Jesus would want it to be.

Worldly Friends – Part 4

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In this series of Dad’s Corners, we have been discussing a question a brother recently asked me concerning how to raise children who will not condemn worldly friends and won’t be drawn to their worldly lifestyles. If you haven’t read the previous Corners I would recommend you do so before reading this one.

We have already seen that Scripture teaches that there isn’t any way for our children to have worldly friends and not be affected by them. “Make no friendship with an angry man; and with a furious man thou shalt not go: Lest thou learn his ways, and get a snare to thy soul” (Proverbs 22:24-25). This verse deals strictly with the angry aspect of worldliness, but we have seen how all types of worldly friends will have the same effect. The closer a child’s heart is drawn to worldly friends, the more he will be changed by them. Therefore, it is dangerous to the souls of our children to have worldly friends.

The family that doesn’t believe worldly friends, Christian or unbeliever, will influence their children is headed for a rude awakening as evidenced by the e-mails we receive from families who are in the midst of just such a crisis situation. They will describe problems they are having with a child who wants to quit homeschooling, make worldly choices, or follow a worldly lifestyle. When we ask about the influences in the life of the youth, we will be told of a worldly friend. The justification the parents give for allowing the friendship in the first place is often that they didn’t want to offend the neighbor family to whom the child belongs.

However, parents should ask themselves if losing their child is worth the possibility of reaching the neighbor? I believe that Proverbs 27:12 has the answer. “A prudent man foreseeth the evil, and hideth himself; but the simple pass on, and are punished.” There will be other ways to share Christ with a neighbor that won’t involve compromising the spiritual direction of our children’s lives.

In our quest to help our children choose not to have worldly friends, our example will be very important. If we have worldly friends, our children will also be drawn to those same kinds of friends. I am defining a friend as someone with whom you spend significant amounts of time. The book of Jude gives us an exhortation and pattern for our interactions with those of the world, and it doesn’t involve friendship. Let’s study it so that we can learn from its instruction.

“Beloved, when I gave all diligence to write unto you of the common salvation, it was needful for me to write unto you, and exhort you that ye should earnestly contend for the faith which was once delivered unto the saints. For there are certain men crept in unawares, who were before of old ordained to this condemnation, ungodly men, turning the grace of our God into lasciviousness, and denying the only Lord God, and our Lord Jesus Christ” (Jude 3,4). Those who are worldly and want to be our friends do not come up and identify themselves as being worldly or ungodly. They are as dangerous to us as they would be to our children because they can deceitfully pull our hearts away from the Lord Jesus by drawing us to their worldliness and ungodliness. The exhortations in Jude’s epistle apply as much to us today as they did when Jude first penned them.

What is the tool a worldly friend uses against a believer? He uses the same one that has been used through the ages. “You’re free in Christ. Go ahead. It’s okay.” The first steps of compromise may be small, but soon bigger ones will be offered, all under the cloak of “grace will cover it.” Jesus said in Matthew 7:15-17, “Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep’s clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves. Ye shall know them by their fruits. Do men gather grapes of thorns, or figs of thistles? Even so every good tree bringeth forth good fruit; but a corrupt tree bringeth forth evil fruit.”

Looking at a man’s fruit and what he promotes is a good way to discern whether he will be a friend that walks after the Spirit or after the flesh. If he is after the Spirit, following his example will lead us to a walk that is holy, without blemish, and a denial of fleshly pleasures. “Then said Jesus unto his disciples, If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me. For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: and whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it” (Matthew 16:24-25).

Worldly friends will not lead us down a path of self-denial but one of gratifying the flesh, lasciviousness, and worldly pleasure. Yet the walk of a believer is to be the opposite. “Teaching us that, denying ungodliness and worldly lusts, we should live soberly, righteously, and godly, in this present world” (Titus 2:12).

In Matthew 7:16, which was quoted above, Jesus said we don’t gather grapes (good fruit) from thorns. In Luke 8:14, Jesus tells us what the thorns of this world are. “And that which fell among thorns are they, which, when they have heard, go forth, and are choked with cares and riches and pleasures of this life, and bring no fruit to perfection.” The cares, riches, and pleasures of this life are the fun things that many believers are chasing today, perhaps because this is what their worldly friends are pursuing. It is probably no wonder then that there is little real spiritual fruit being produced from these lives. I find it deeply saddening that the pursuit of fun and pleasure is a “high place” today within the professing church. We now live in a pagan nation while the professing church has lost its savor as salt because of the pursuit of fun. (Side note: is it any wonder that youth groups and all their fun activities have not produced real dynamic fruit?)

As we lead our children away from worldly friends, we need to set the example for them. We want to evaluate the fruit in the lives of those with whom we spend time. Are they drawing us closer to the Savior or away from Him toward fun and entertainment? I want to conclude this series next month by finishing our look into Jude for direction in our interactions with those who are worldly.

Worldly Friends – Part 3

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This month we continue with the topic of how we teach our children to love others who choose a worldly path but not embrace what they are doing. The previous Dad’s Corners can be read here.

We instruct our children best by our example. Our “walk” prepares the way for them to receive what we teach. Therefore, we could ask ourselves how we, as parents, are demonstrating the love of Jesus toward the worldly “Christians” we encounter while not being influenced by the sin in their lives.

Paul said in Philippians 3:17, “Brethren, be followers together of me, and mark them which walk so as ye have us for an ensample.” Paul was commanding us to note those who live a Christ-honoring life and follow them as examples. He also encouraged us to notice those who do not have a godly life and come alongside them for the purpose of restoring them. “Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted” (Galatians 6:1).

Paul is directing that we would do two things with the information we learn from observing people’s lives. We look to those whose walk is Christ-honoring as examples, but we work toward restoring those who have a sinful, worldly lifestyle being careful that we ourselves aren’t influenced by their sin. Therefore, we can learn from Paul’s godly example as to how he lovingly attempted to help believers who were making bad choices.

Paul’s words in 2 Corinthians 2:4 express his broken heart and concern for the Corinthian believers. “For out of much affliction and anguish of heart I wrote unto you with many tears; not that ye should be grieved, but that ye might know the love which I have more abundantly unto you” (2 Corinthians 2:4).

“And I will very gladly spend and be spent for you; though the more abundantly I love you, the less I be loved” (2 Corinthians 12:15). Paul demonstrated his love by ministering with a willingness to suffer. Even at the risk of the Corinthians rejecting his leadership, Paul rebuked their conduct and did not back down. He was saying in verse fifteen that the more he loved them by speaking the truth in love, the less he was loved by them. Usually, the more someone is loved, the more he loves in return.

People want to be accepted and loved, and Paul was no different as noted by the fact that he mentioned that the Corinthians were loving him less. Paul, led by the Holy Spirit, didn’t come to the Corinthians to win their acceptance through funny pulpit stories and “I’m okay, you’re okay” talk. “When I therefore was thus minded, did I use lightness? or the things that I purpose, do I purpose according to the flesh, that with me there should be yea yea, and nay nay?” (2 Corinthians 1:17). Paul told them the truth about their sinful, worldly conduct and God’s thoughts on it even though he knew it was costing him the feelings of love the Corinthians should have had for him. “But as God is true, our word toward you was not yea and nay” (2 Corinthians 1:18).

A good doctor will tell the patient what his real condition is and what is necessary to restore him to health. Paul demonstrated in the Epistles that he was a good spiritual doctor because he was willing to directly address the bad news of their spiritual need. “But speaking the truth in love, may grow up into him in all things, which is the head, even Christ:” (Ephesians 4:15).

The Greek word for love in Ephesians 4:15 is agape and is well defined in 1 Corinthians 13:4-7. Paul’s love fits the criteria that is set forth in these verses. He was definitely kind and patient. He wasn’t proud as he exhorted them, but rather he was honest and direct.

In Ephesians we find another of the many examples in the New Testament of Paul speaking the truth in love to those in his flocks by exhorting them to stop living a worldly lifestyle. “This I say therefore, and testify in the Lord, that ye henceforth walk not as other Gentiles walk, in the vanity of their mind, Having the understanding darkened, being alienated from the life of God through the ignorance that is in them, because of the blindness of their heart: Who being past feeling have given themselves over unto lasciviousness, to work all uncleanness with greediness” (Ephesians 4:17-19).

Paul has set forth the example for believers as to how we love worldly believers, and we are the example for our children. Do we speak the truth in love to those who are worldly and help them to see their condition before the Lord Jesus? We may not be in a position of spiritual authority over our Christian friends, but we are still able to admonish one another in love. “And I myself also am persuaded of you, my brethren, that ye also are full of goodness, filled with all knowledge, able also to admonish one another” (Romans 15:14).

In the e-mails I receive, it often appears that people prefer to “wink” at the worldliness in others’ lives than to risk the possibility of losing their friendship or appearing to be “holier than thou.” This is generally stated in the context of a parent writing and expressing concern about the influences on his children from worldly families and friends. Rather than offend a brother by bringing up worldliness in his life or his family’s lives, the parent will allow his children to be in jeopardy of worldly influences.

Ignoring sin is more comfortable than admonishing. “Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend” (Proverbs 27:17). When two pieces of steel are used to sharpen each other, friction results. A true friend will welcome and receive an admonishment. However, “A scorner loveth not one that reproveth him: neither will he go unto the wise” (Proverbs 15:12). Only when a scorner repents will he come to realize that the one rebuking him was acting out of love.

Could it be that church discipline is so rare today because few are willing to take a chance of offending any one, and therefore, sin is tolerated? If brother would admonish brother in an ongoing, casual way—as iron sharpeneth iron—I believe there would far less need for church discipline because worldly, sinful lifestyles would be dealt with before they became major sins.

Worldliness is rampant among believers today. Similarly to the way a cold bug spreads in the physical realm, one worldly family spends time with a godly family and spiritually infects that family with their worldliness. It takes the deep love of a godly family, and a willingness to be rejected, to try to help a worldly family by speaking the truth in love. An evidence of our love for others is when we are willing to suffer loss of fellowship as a result of their not appreciating an admonition. Are we more concerned about their spiritual health or our desire for friendship? In a time of political correctness and tolerance, may we choose to be courageous and love others enough to encourage them in a closer walk with the Lord Jesus.

In this process, it is important that we share with our children concerning these interactions that we are having with worldly brethren. We want them to know biblically why we are speaking the truth in love—what the sin is, what Scripture says about it, and what the outcomes will be for those who choose not to repent. We desire that our children would understand the consequences of sin, and then abhor sin and a worldly lifestyle. This is an important part of our children learning to love the sinner and hate the sin rather than embracing it.

As our children see that our hearts are broken with concern for others and that we are willing to speak the truth in love, they are learning to love those for whom Christ died. When we share with them the truth of the Scripture, they will understand the seriousness of not embracing the world. If speaking the truth in love causes a distancing of a friendship, our children will observe our example of choosing fellowship with the Lord Jesus as being more important than worldly friends who will compromise our walk with Jesus. We will continue this next month.

Worldly Friends – Part 2

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Last month we discussed the seriousness of friendship with the world. Please see Part 1 if you didn’t read it last month or you want to review its information. We discovered that a friend of the world is an enemy of God. Therefore, it is a dangerous thing to have worldly friends due to their influence in our lives and also our children’s. One question this might bring to mind is how are we to harmonize the command “Go ye therefore, and teach all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost: Teaching them to observe all things whatsoever I have commanded you. . .” (Matthew 28:19-20) with Ephesians 6:4 that tells us to bring up our children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord?

To answer this, we must realize that Jesus is not commanding our children to reach the lost. That is our responsibility as mature believers in Christ. Children are children (big surprise?), and those they are around will greatly influence them. “He that walketh with wise men shall be wise: but a companion of fools shall be destroyed” (Proverbs 13:20). Therefore if we don’t want our children to be worldly, we can’t have our children spending time with those who are worldly. This may be a shock to some, but Ephesians 4:14 is clear, “That we henceforth be no more children, tossed to and fro, and carried about with every wind of doctrine, by the sleight of men, and cunning craftiness, whereby they lie in wait to deceive.” Reaching the unsaved or ministering to worldly Christians is our responsibility not our children’s because our children will be pulled down by worldly associations.

Some may not agree with the idea that children are not called to reach the lost or restore worldly Christians, but Scripture always agrees with Scripture. The Holy Spirit led Paul to write in Ephesians 4:14 that children will be tossed about and influenced by those they are around. Whether it is worldly Christians in clubs, teams, school or even church, they will exhibit a strong negative pull on the godly youth the more time they spend together. Certainly, the lost are far, far worse in their influence than even a worldly believer.

Consider Jesus’ disciples, who were men that Jesus was training personally. When Jesus first sent out these grown men, yet immature in their faith, He sent them out two by two. “And he called unto him the twelve, and began to send them forth by two and two; and gave them power over unclean spirits” (Mark 6:7). Missionaries today often go two-by-two because there is spiritual encouragement and accountability when two are sharing with the lost. The Lord is not going to send out a child to reach those who will be a stumbling block to his own faith.

Then let’s answer another question that begs to be asked. “Why would a child of more faith be pulled down by associating with a worldly child of less faith?” Aren’t we who are saved to be stronger than the world? “Ye are of God, little children, and have overcome them: because greater is he that is in you, than he that is in the world” (1 John 4:4). However, we still have the flesh to contend with, and Paul speaks clearly to this war.

Paul describes the battle that rages within each believer in Galatians 5:17: “For the flesh lusteth against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh: and these are contrary the one to the other: so that ye cannot do the things that ye would.” Surely, no one reading this would consider his child more spiritually strong and mature than Paul. Paul shares his struggles in doing what is right in Romans 7:18-19. Briefly, here, Paul says, “For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing: for to will is present with me; but how to perform that which is good I find not. For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do.” Even a spiritually mature person like Paul struggled in following the Spirit; therefore, our children will be pulled down by worldly associations.

Every saved person has two natures within him—a new saved spirit and the flesh. These two are at war constantly, and the battle is what Paul is describing in Romans 7:15-25. As we grow in Christ by reading the Word and making obedient choices, our spirit grows stronger in the Lord Jesus and more able to resist the pull of the flesh. However, even someone like Paul, an apostle of Jesus Christ, acknowledges the reality of the struggle. If it is such a battle for the mature, then that explains why children are so easily swayed.

A good example of this might be the game called tug of war. When you have only two people on the rope—each one pulling against the other—the strongest one wins. However, it is no contest when there are two on one side pulling against one on the other. That is why a Christian youth is pulled down by a worldly youth (Christian or lost). You have two against one. The worldly youth joins forces with the Christian youth’s flesh, and the two are more powerful than the Christian’s spirit can resist. The result is one more Christian youth being pulled to the world.

Parents frequently tell us that they can’t find like-hearted friends for their children so they just pray for their children and believe that their children’s faith will not be harmed by worldly Christian friends. If one doesn’t heed Scriptural warnings, disaster will likely result. “A prudent man foreseeth the evil, and hideth himself: but the simple pass on, and are punished” (Proverbs 22:3). I have heard deep sorrow in the voices of many parents who have shared with us over the years about how they lost their children due to worldly friends, and the greatest tragedy is that it could have been avoided.

May each parent be on guard and resist the fallacy that their children won’t be harmed by worldly friends. We parents are the ones who are called to reach the lost and restore the worldly brother. Even then we must be on guard as well. “Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted” (Galatians 6:1). Here Paul is exhorting us to come alongside a stumbling brother and help restore him. Furthermore, Paul adds a caution that we should be careful in this effort to restore because we might also be tempted in the sin that snared our brother. Even those mature in Christ are in danger of being pulled down by the worldly brother.

Next month we will continue this discussion on living in the world, loving those who are worldly, and not condemning them.

Worldly Friends – Part 1

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A brother in the Lord recently asked me a question that deserved far more attention than the brief answer I was able to give him due to lack of time and thought. If we hadn’t been leaving when the question was asked, I’m sure it would have sparked a great discussion. The question was, “How do we teach our children to love others who choose a worldly path, but not embrace what they are doing and not condemn them?”

Every dad who understands the need to love others and yet has purposed to raise his children “in the nurture and admonition of the Lord” (Ephesians 6:4) should be concerned about this. We want to show the love of Christ to all we come in contact with and teach our children to do the same. We should teach our children to shun what Scripture says is wrong and worldly but to embrace what is of the Lord. In doing so, our children will view others through our grid of teaching and deem their conduct, activities and dress as good, bad, or in between. It is a very difficult challenge for our children to choose to live for the Lord Jesus, but not be influenced by other’s lifestyles and also not condemn them.

First, we dads must realize that being worldly is ungodly and dangerous to our children, otherwise this whole topic is a moot point. “Ye adulterers and adulteresses, know ye not that the friendship of the world is enmity with God? whosoever therefore will be a friend of the world is the enemy of God” (James 4:4). “Teaching us that, denying ungodliness and worldly lusts, we should live soberly, righteously, and godly, in this present world” (Titus 2:12). The word “friendship” in this verse simply means “fondness.” James is saying that even just a fondness for the world makes one an enemy of God. I don’t want that for myself or for my children.

James 4:4 seems to be a very black and white statement in a black, white, and gray world. How does a parent decide what is too much worldliness? I, personally, would rather not be even a little bit of an enemy with God. Isn’t it better to remain on the side of righteousness and to make sure we don’t have any kind of friendship with the world? Each dad needs to think hard about this and the ramifications to his family. “If ye then be risen with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ sitteth on the right hand of God. Set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth” (Colossians 3:1-2).

Next, it is important that we understand the danger associated with our children having worldly friends. If our children spend time with worldly children, will that worldliness “rub off” on them? “That we henceforth be no more children, tossed to and fro, and carried about with every wind of doctrine, by the sleight of men, and cunning craftiness, whereby they lie in wait to deceive” (Ephesians 4:14). In this verse, we are told that we should no longer be children because children are easily influenced by others. Children are the example used in this verse of those who are being easily led away. This verse is very clear. It doesn’t limit those who are led away to children who are simple or gullible. ALL children fit this category of being tossed to and fro. We want to think our children are different—that they are strong and stable. However, Scripture says children are led astray. This is the nature of children, and it is critical that every parent believes what Scripture says. If we don’t apply this truth to our parenting, our children are in danger.

Whoever are children are around will influence them. That is one reason why we are told in Deuteronomy 6:7 to be with our children. “And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up.” If we are with our children we have the opportunity to influence them ourselves and to protect them from unwholesome influences. Because of the preciousness of our children and how easily they are led astray, the Lord is telling us to be with our children.

Parents attending conservative churches frequently tell us of a struggle they have. They are pleased with the church in that it is conservative and doesn’t have programs that split up the family, yet often other parents will not oversee their children. After the worship time, the children are allowed to run loose, away from the parents, and negative “fruit” prevails with the children.

I know some parents think their children will conduct themselves properly even when among those who are acting inappropriately. That might be true, but I have seen many times through the years groups of men drawn into foolishness when they never would have acted that way with their wives present. I think most will find that even more “mature” youth will tend toward folly when among the “right” group of peers. It may not be as bad as worldly children initially, but it will all lead in the same ungodly direction. To avoid this influence on our children, we will need to be with them, and that will impact our time. As adults we want to enjoy fellowshipping with other adults while letting our children have “fun” with the other children. However, the fun they are having is often not for their edification.

It is common to hear about a family who has tragically lost their home to a fire. Even if everyone escapes safely, it is a terrible thing for a family’s home to be destroyed. Yet, many families choose to have fireplaces and woodstoves in their homes knowing fire presents a great danger to life and property. Why? It is because they are choosing to put safeguards in place to manage the danger of the fire. In the same way, it is important that each family understands the seriousness of exposing their children to worldly children and that they choose appropriate safeguards.

Now that we are in agreement as to the seriousness of friendship with the world, what does Scripture say about teaching children to love others and not condemn them? We are called to love others, but how we do that and protect our family is the key issue. We will continue this important topic next month.

Listening to God’s Word

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As I look back over my fifty-eight years of life, I am amazed at the brevity of life. Time passes so quickly, and it seems like a short time ago that we arrived in Leavenworth, Kansas. However it has been nineteen years since our move here from Seattle. It is now September of this year, but it seems like last month it was New Year’s Day and last week summer was just beginning. In the blink of an eye, the year will be over.

One of the blessings I have experienced from our nursing home church is a greater awareness of the preciousness of time. We have many dear friends who never planned on being in a nursing home, but there they are. Some are there temporarily as they rehabilitate after an injury or surgery, but most know it is the last place they will live on this earth. The days of driving their cars where they would like to go are gone. Now they have a much smaller set of wheels attached to their chairs and another is pushing them.

Even the simple choice of what one wants to have for a meal is no longer theirs. There may be an option of roast chicken or pot pie, but if you are hungry for a taco or pizza and it isn’t on the menu it isn’t going to happen. You don’t even choose when you want to bathe because someone else comes and tells you it is your turn.

How long before each of us has our own private “push-chair” with wheels, and we are living in a group home of some sort? Maybe some think that their children will care for them when it is needed, when in reality that may or may not happen. Things change, and there is nothing sure about life except we are in the process of dying.

In Job chapter one, we read how Job had a wonderful life but in one day, it was totally changed. His seven sons and three daughters were killed, and his vast livestock holdings lost to thieving bands and “acts of God.” Life had been good, and then suddenly it all was destroyed. Yet, Job said, “. . . Naked came I out of my mother’s womb, and naked shall I return thither: the LORD gave, and the LORD hath taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD” (Job 1:21). In a moment of time, life was forever changed for Job.

Then, it went from bad to worse for Job because he next lost his health when he was covered with horrible sores all over his body. “So went Satan forth from the presence of the Lord, and smote Job with sore boils from the sole of his foot unto his crown” (Job 2:7). Job looked so hideous that his “friends” hardly recognized him. Job’s suffering was so bad that he mourned the day he was born and wished for death. What a change, and it occurred so quickly.

Yet, with all of Job’s hardships, Job was able to praise God. In Job 1:21 he said, “… blessed be the name of the LORD.” Then in Job 2:10, Job exhibits amazing maturity and understanding when he tells his wife “. . . shall we receive good at the hand of God, and shall we not receive evil?” We need Job’s strength of spirit to deal with the difficulties of life that come our way.

At times we see that strength of spirit in our dear brothers and sisters in the Lord at the nursing home when they face trials and suffering. We see that strength in those who have made it their custom to be heavily in the Word of God through their lives. The Bible gives us God’s perspective on life and strengthens our spirit when we face problems and challenges.

Maybe you are having your personal and family time in the Word every day. However, there may be other times available that you could listen to the Bible, but you have not thought of those possibilities. I have Scripture available to me all day everywhere during my day, except in the shower. We are so blessed to be living in a time when God’s Word is readily accessible to us constantly. I have a Bible at my desk, in the bathroom, living room, bedroom, in my vehicles, and on my person. The blessings Scripture offer us come from the reading or hearing it and then obeying.

Since life is busy, we often can’t sit down to read the Bible once we begin the day, however, we might be able to listen to it. Several examples of this from my life would be when I’m doing projects that don’t require a lot of concentration such as painting, yard work, or cleanup of some sort. There are other times when we are driving, and no one is talking to me that I can listen to Scripture. There were times when we were working on the bus that we had Scripture being read in the background via an MP3 player. The children loved it. Now I’m always on the lookout for times when I can turn Scripture on.

Years ago, I purchased a New Testament on CD, which I used for a long time. I woke up to it every morning, and the only negative was that I was tempted to lie in bed listening to it. More recently, a brother introduced me to the New Testament on an MP3 player. I now have it on my cell phone and on an iPod. It is a delight to my soul when I have Scripture playing. I have to use a warm compress on my eyes every day and taking the time to do that was such a nuisance. However, now I’ve started listening to Scripture during the five minutes I do that and what was a bother, is now a blessing.

The website where I downloaded the New Testament from is FaithComesbyHearing.com. They have the New Testament available in both non-drama and slightly dramatized versions. The dramatized version has some voices that you may not prefer, but both versions are very well done. One example I remember of using a wrong voice is in Revelation when they used some female voices for angels. However, if in doubt go with the non-dramatized version. With MP3 players becoming quite inexpensive, this is a wonderful way to be able to hear the Word of God more throughout the day.

May I encourage you to evaluate your day for ways that you can more fully incorporate reading Scripture or listening to it? Personal and family Bible times are the essentials and starting blocks. Build from there using CD players, MP3 players, and other medias that are available in your home and vehicle. Time passes quickly. Presently, you can make the choices as to how your time is spent, but one never knows about the future. If you invest time in the Word of God, you will find blessings for you now and in the future. As your heart and mind is bathed in the Word of God, I believe you will experience spiritual growth, strength for times of trial, and a heart at peace.

Personal Bible Time with Your Children

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This month I wanted to take a few minutes to share something that has been on my heart and might be an encouragement to you—my daily morning Bible time with my children.

I wonder if this verse isn’t one of the most widely quoted verses in homeschooling circles. “And thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might. And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart: And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up. And thou shalt bind them for a sign upon thine hand, and they shall be as frontlets between thine eyes. And thou shalt write them upon the posts of thy house, and on thy gates” (Deuteronomy 6:5-9). It so clearly presents a father’s need to diligently instruct his children in the Word of God everyday. Part of this instruction will be helping our children learn to read the Word, understand it, and apply it to their lives. I believe this is achieved through leading my children to have a personal time every day for Bible reading and prayer.

In addition to our evening family Bible time, we have a time of individual reading of the Word and personal prayer every morning. Weekday mornings, my children and I gather together in the living room to individually read our Bibles. I say weekdays because the children have the option of sleeping in an hour on Saturdays and Sundays if they were up later the previous evening and need more sleep. On those days when they sleep in, I will be finished with my Bible time as they are gathering for theirs.

I dearly love the early morning hours with my children and look forward to them when I get up. The children are awakened by their own alarm clocks based on how much time they need to get up, dressed, and be in the living room at the appointed time. Some will gather a few minutes early to visit until it is time to start our Bible reading at 5:45 a.m. Then we each read our Bibles to ourselves for a half hour. At 6:15, we close our Bibles, kneel, and pray silently for fifteen minutes until 6:30 a.m. At that time, Teri and I leave to walk, and the children begin their responsibilities for the day.

There is something special about being together with my children and watching them read their Bibles. I like being physically close to them even though we spread out around the living room. There were a number of years when I had one of the younger children snuggled up beside me, and that was a treat. However, even now just being in the same room while we fellowship with the Lord Jesus is precious to me.

There is something about those early morning hours that adds a sense of peace to our Bible reading. At that time, we don’t hear cars, lawn mowers, or children outside playing. It is just my family gathered with their Bibles and the occasional turning of a page or the clicking of a pen to write a note. It is a wonderfully peaceful setting.

I believe another benefit of our personal Bible time in one room is that my children observe me spending time in the Word. Often, if Dad is reading his Bible, he does it alone before the children are up, in his study, or another room where they never see him. While they may know that he puts a priority on his personal time in the Word, seeing it in action will be an even more powerful testimony.

On occasion, one of the children will ask a quick question. Since it disturbs others’ reading, it isn’t often, but it does provide the opportunity to answer the question while it is fresh on their heart. Not only does it clear the issue for them, but there are others who might benefit as well. I like it because it shows me they are thinking about what they are reading.

Have you noticed at a mealtime when something is really tasty someone might exclaim, “Mom, this is great!” In a similar fashion, it excites my heart when one of the children finds a verse that reveals new truth, and in his enthusiasm he has to share it with us. I love for the other children to see that excitement and hear the discovery as well.

A benefit of being together is that it adds accountability. Occasionally there have been times when due to a late night, one or more of us was extra sleepy. If we were reading our Bibles in different rooms, it wouldn’t be too difficult to drift off to sleep. However, when we are together, the sound of sleep breathing in a very quiet living room is pretty distinguishable and doesn’t go on for long. A simple clearing of the throat, dropping of a shoe on the floor, or the snickers going around the room is all that is needed for the sleepy head to find new energy to stay awake.

There is also the blessing of drawing my family into closer fellowship due to the “camaraderie” of doing something together. I can’t explain it, but it just works out that way. In a time when everything in our world tries to separate the family and pull hearts away, I want all I can find that will bring the hearts of my children toward each other and the Lord Jesus.

Beginning when my children can read fairly well on their own, usually around eight years of age, I have them join us in the living room for personal Bible time. When the children are younger, they are still asleep when we have our Bible time. That means getting up for Bible time is a looked-forward-to stage in their lives because it represents, in their minds, a transition from being one of the little children to becoming one of the big ones. I try to structure the evening time so that the children can choose to go to bed at times that will allow them to get the amount of sleep they need each night and be up for early morning Bible time. After the child has consistently had his personal Bible time for six months, I purchase him a new study Bible and cover.

Through my interactions with Christians who have struggled or are struggling, it has become obvious that without a daily time in the Word, they are rudderless. They lack the spiritual grounding that would direct them through the storms of life. By giving my children the discipline of daily time in the Word, I am handing them the tools they need for spiritual growth and stability.

I’m not saying if you have individual Bible times in different rooms, you are doing something wrong. The fact that you are having Bible time is wonderful. However, since we have found such blessings from being together, I thought it might encourage you to try it as well. Even if everyone in your family already has his own personal time of Bible reading, you may want to start being together in the same room for it and see if you experience the blessings like our family has gained.

It’s a War!

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I love it when Teri is giving a workshop and tells moms that the alarm clock is their friend not their enemy. That statement is usually followed by either chuckles or outright laughter from many in the audience. I suppose a mom hearing that the alarm clock is her friend is similar to a dad who is told that work is a blessing from God. He is likely to laugh at that thought. Through the years I have heard so many men complain about their jobs and how they dread going into work.

The “flesh” is something isn’t it? Not wanting to get out of bed in the morning and complaining about work are examples of fleshly responses to God’s calling for our life. Even Paul said, “For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing: for to will is present with me; but how to perform that which is good I find not. For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do” (Romans 7:18-19). In one way, it is surprising to me that even Paul had a struggle with the flesh. On the other hand, it shouldn’t be a surprise because Jesus said, “Watch and pray, that ye enter not into temptation: the spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak” (Matthew 26:41).

Jesus was saying that in regard to doing the right thing, our flesh is weak. The inverse is true as well because the flesh pulls strongly toward what is wrong. When I look at the struggles in my life, I see that I’m at war with my flesh. Like Paul, I know what I should do, but sometimes I don’t do it.

I suppose my greatest fleshly struggle is with eating too much. I know mentally what my body appropriately needs to sustain itself, yet, I often choose excess. A person can know what’s right to do but still struggle because the flesh is weak. I suspect that most reading this have a struggle with excess in some areas.

Jesus said we are to watch and pray if we are to avoid giving in to a temptation. Watch means as we would expect—to be vigilant and observant for those things that are contrary to the Spirit. It means we are to make a conscious decision, a choice that we will be on guard against a temptation to do something to which the Spirit has said, “No.” For me the majority of the problem is that I really don’t want to be on guard against the temptation of eating too much, because I enjoy it. We prefer to embrace the temptation. A poor defense indeed would be for the soldier to be on the front line watching and guarding, but when the enemy comes near, he gives him a big hug.

The added difficulty with overcoming the flesh concerning food is that in a sense it isn’t wrong. Everyone has to eat. Yet, if our eating isn’t done in moderation, it is wrong, and there will be consequences for it. Normally, the consequences come in the form of gaining weight and putting one’s health at risk. Overindulgence in food is so prevalent among believers today. However, overeating is just one area of many where we can end up being a slave to it.

The person without self-control is similar to a city with no walls for protection. “He that hath no rule over his own spirit is like a city that is broken down, and without walls” (Proverbs 25:28). Without protection a man is open to being spoiled by others. The most likely spoiler in overeating would be disease of the heart and arteries. I’ve been amazed when I’ve been in the doctor’s office. When I look around the waiting room, I see that the vast majority of those there are significantly overweight. There appears to be a definite connection between being overweight and ill health.

In 2 Timothy 3:3-4 we read of the bad “company” a person who is incontinent—without self control—keeps. “Without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good, Traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God” (2 Timothy 3:3-4). Sinful behavior goes hand-in-hand with lack of self control.

In addition to the possible consequences to my health, I’m troubled by my lack of self-control and the knowledge of setting a bad example for my children. My desire is that I’m an encouragement to my children in raising them in the nurture and admonition of the Lord, not that I would be a detriment. What makes matters worse is that when we lack self-control and are covetous of things, whether it is sleep, food, sweets, soda, pleasure, entertainment, or whatever else it might be, we will likely foster similar appetites in our children. Then, instead of bringing up our children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord (Ephesians 6:4), we are causing them to stumble.

To take it a step further, we could look at what leads to overeating. Isn’t it being covetous of good tasting things and the pleasure they afford us? I don’t know about you, but I have yet to covet food like lettuce, brussel sprouts, and carrots. We covet the things that thrill the taste buds. “For this ye know, that no whoremonger, nor unclean person, nor covetous man, who is an idolater, hath any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God” (Ephesians 5:5). We might be tempted to excuse being covetous, but when a covetous man is called an idolater, there is no mistaking it for the sin that it is.

Jesus said there are two things to help with lack of self-control—vigilance and prayer. To be vigilant means we have to be watchful for something that poses a threat. For me that is the greatest struggle. My flesh doesn’t consider food harmful. As a first step, it is needful to take appropriate verses such as I’ve used in this Corner, memorize and then meditate on them to acquire God’s viewpoint. Then, once we have the Lord’s mindset, we can be watchful for temptation. However, it takes a moving of the will, a conscious decision to agree with the Lord. Once we have made that choice, prayer is then the vehicle for adding grace to the decision for moderation in a particular area.

I have previously followed this path for other areas of struggle, and now it is time to deal with the food issue. I need to cry out to the Lord for grace in being a man of self-control, and I need to be vigilant in having before me the seriousness of my example in the lives of my children. May we be the men of God that God desires and enables us to be.

Countdown

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Sarah and I walked together the last couple of mornings because Teri, my usual walking partner, has been quite sick with a cold. During our walk, Sarah and I have enjoyed our time greatly. She had a thought this morning that I’ve continued to consider, and it is a great subject for this month’s Dad’s Corner.

Sarah wondered how life would be different if everyone wore something on the front of their clothing, maybe similar to a ChorePack, but instead of chores, it displayed the month and year a person would die. Think about how sobering it would be to have a constant reminder each time you looked at a person telling you he only had so much longer before he was going to face God in eternity. Life might look something like the following scenario.

This evening you see your neighbor and exchange a few courteous words with him as you take out the trash. You notice that he is going to die September 15th of next year. You make a mental note that you would like to spend more time discussing the Lord with him. You’ll try to work something out for next week.

You go inside and finish helping your family clean up after dinner. You look at your wife’s eternity date and wonder what her life will be like without you for the thirty additional years she is going to outlive you. You still have another fifteen years together before you die, but you can’t help but consider all the unknowns for her when you are gone. At least you are committed to giving “your all” to these last fifteen years with her and serving the Lord faithfully in everything. You have a twinge of guilt in thinking back to years that were wasted when you were younger and didn’t have the same value of time.

Your mind drifts to your brother. You both were raised in a “Christian” home where Dad and Mom were token Christians. Sadly, your brother has followed after Dad’s example and has little time for the Lord. It’s not that he is evil or anything like that. He goes to church and prays before meals, but he feels God put us on this earth to enjoy it, and he is going to have fun with everything that is not bad. His idea is that if God hasn’t said “Thou shalt not…” then it is okay, because he is “free in Christ.” As such, his life is dominated by play and entertainment, but sadly there is a noticeable absence of spiritual fruit.

You remember back years ago to when the Lord convicted you that you were Jesus’ servant and as such, you were to spend your time in accordance with His direction. That helped you understand that “free in Christ” meant you were free from the bondage of sin, but you were a servant of the living God. “For, brethren, ye have been called unto liberty; only use not liberty for an occasion to the flesh, but by love serve one another” (Galatians 5:13). Therefore, your time was no longer yours to do with what you wanted to do.

Then your thoughts drift to next Sunday—Resurrection Sunday. Though it is a special time of deep meaning for your immediate family, it is a time of folly and nonsense for your extended family. Therefore, you have greatly mixed feelings with the approaching day knowing that conflict will arise. Your brother will insist that you and the children come over to his house for their yearly egg hunt. He always dresses up in a giant bunny costume and encourages you to “lighten up” because it is only “harmless fun.” What’s worse is that others in the extended family all side with him and think you are a legalistic “Pharisee” when you want to avoid the ungodly fun the world enjoys on Resurrection Sunday and instead focus on Jesus’ death, burial, and resurrection from the dead.

Your brother has declared to the family that when he hits the five year mark before he dies, he really wants to live it up. He’s saving to that end so that he can stop working and just concentrate on having the best time possible before he is “pushing up daisies.”

What a stark contrast to your life, you muse. Since you are bought with the blood of your precious Savior, Jesus Christ, you know your time is not your own. “Forasmuch as ye know that ye were not redeemed with corruptible things, as silver and gold, from your vain conversation received by tradition from your fathers; But with the precious blood of Christ, as of a lamb without blemish and without spot:” (1 Peter 1:18-19). You understand that a servant of the Lord Jesus only does what he is commanded or given permission to do and finds great joy in that. The world’s fun is just an expensive counterfeit to joy in the Lord. Your heart turns once again to praying for your brother and other extended family members, desiring for them to have a sweetness and fervency in their relationship with Jesus Christ.

You are burdened when you look at people and see the constant reminder that they are facing eternity soon. “Remember how short my time is: wherefore hast thou made all men in vain?” (Psalms 89:47). There is so little time to share Christ and so many that need Him. “Say not ye, There are yet four months, and then cometh harvest? behold, I say unto you, Lift up your eyes, and look on the fields; for they are white already to harvest” (John 4:35). The urgency you feel to be busy about the Lord’s business is great, and the time is short. “So teach us to number our days, that we may apply our hearts unto wisdom” (Psalms 90:12).

Well, now that cleanup is finished, it’s time for Bible time. Everyone heads into the living room and grabs their Bibles. Tomorrow is a new day. How will the Lord direct? Even though the reality is that people don’t wear about “eternity dates,” every person does have a day they will die. May we live our lives with that in mind and not waste one opportunity to share Christ!