All posts by Teri Maxwell

Teri Maxwell is wife to Steve for over 40 years, mom to eight children (three married), and grandma to eight. She loves keeping her home running smoothly and sharing with women in the vein of Titus 2:4&5. Teri homeschooled for thirty years, and she's graduated all her children. In between her other responsibilities, she manages to squeeze in writing time. She is co-author of the popular Managers of Their Homes and Managers of Their Chores. In addition, Teri's written three books just for ladies Homeschooling with a Meek & Quiet Spirit, Sweet Journey, and Sweet Relationships. She has been writing monthly encouragement articles for homeschool moms for 25 years. Find more information on Teri Maxwell and her books.

What About Me? – Part 2

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Last month we began looking into what Scripture tells us about our workload, and attitude toward it, as mothers and particularly as homeschooling moms. Around us, we are often bombarded with a philosophy that says: Take care of yourself, make time for yourself, you deserve a break, don’t push too hard. Homeschooling moms find their lives filled to the brim, allowing little, if any, time left over for their personal interests or pursuits. This creates a conflict. We are told to take it easy, and yet there is so much to do. Is something wrong? What should our expectations of this be?

“Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light” (Matthew 11:28-30). In evaluating these verses, we see that Jesus tells us He will give us rest. He then goes on to define what this rest is: a rest for our souls. We find here that Jesus says His yoke is easy, and His burden is light, but it is still a yoke and a burden. The words “yoke” and “burden” imply work and effort. These verses don’t appear to be saying that we won’t have to do anything, but rather that the Lord Jesus is doing it with us. He is the One strengthening us for the task. He wants us yoked to Him for the work He has set before us. We aren’t to rely on ourselves to meet the demands placed upon us, but rather we are to depend on His resources. I believe that it is the rest of the soul—looking to Jesus—that makes the yoke easy and the burden light in the midst of the work.

“But which of you, having a servant plowing or feeding cattle, will say unto him by and by, when he is come from the field, Go and sit down to meat? And will not rather say unto him, Make ready wherewith I may sup, and gird thyself, and serve me, till I have eaten and drunken; and afterward thou shalt eat and drink? thank that servant because he did the things that were commanded him? I trow not. So likewise ye, when ye shall have done all those things which are commanded you, say, We are unprofitable servants: we have done that which was our duty to do” (Luke 17:7-10).

This story speaks volumes to my heart concerning my expectations about my personal workload. In these verses, I don’t see the master commending his servant and offering him a quiet evening with a warm bath and a refreshing drink for his diligent work all day. The world’s philosophy of work seems to be quite the opposite of what this example shows. From the world, I hear statements like, “You have worked hard; now you deserve to take a break. Take time for yourself. It’s your reward.”

In these verses from Luke 17, I feel the Lord showing me that He values service and obedience in my life. He wants my all. He is concerned about my heart completely following Him—no matter how much work is involved. I am only an “unprofitable servant” doing my duty in obedience to my Master, Jesus Christ. My reward comes from Him in the form of the fruit of the Spirit, a rest of soul, my relationship with Him and with my family, rather than in the form of amusement. My joy comes from serving my family, my greatest treasure, more than from having fun.

Again, please don’t misunderstand me. I am not saying we won’t ever be able to rest from our labor. The Lord knows our needs, and He provides rest for us. It is likely He will give each person rest in different ways at different times. I encourage you to look for and be grateful for the rest the Lord has supplied in your days. For example, in my life one time of rest is our family Bible time. We spend about an hour in the Word every night. As we sit, while reading and discussing the Word, my spiritual soul is fed while my physical body rests.

Another example of rest comes from God resting on the seventh day after six days of creation. Then He told the Israelites to observe a Sabbath day each week, a day of worship and rest. Even at that, though, the Sabbath was not a day for a person to please himself. “If thou turn away thy foot from the sabbath, from doing thy pleasure on my holy day; and call the sabbath a delight, the holy of the LORD, honourable; and shalt honour him, not doing thine own ways, nor finding thine own pleasure, nor speaking thine own words: Then shalt thou delight thyself in the LORD; and I will cause thee to ride upon the high places of the earth, and feed thee with the heritage of Jacob thy father: for the mouth of the LORD hath spoken it” (Isaiah 58:13-14). Our family has a weekly day of worship and rest. On that day, my normal work is set aside, meals are simple, and there is no school, cleaning, or laundry done.

I am not telling us that we skip needed sleep to accomplish what the Lord has put in front of us. I deal specifically with sleep in this Mom’s Corner. What I am saying, though, is let’s expect that the Lord will use our obedience to Him to the fullest and that our lives will be filled with self-sacrifice and work. I am saying let’s consider whether our focus is to get through with our work so we can have time to ourselves or to “Set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth” (Colossians 3:2). I want to find my joy in what He has called me to do rather than directing my thoughts at when I can have fun.

I am also not saying we can’t do anything we enjoy. Instead I am asking that we consider our focus. Is our purpose to make it through the work so we can “play,” or is our purpose to love our families by serving them? My heart’s desire is that what I am doing as a homeschool mom and homemaker is what I enjoy doing the most—that it is what my heart craves doing.

In two places in the New Testament, Paul tells us not to grow weary in what the Lord Jesus has called us to do. “And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not” (Galatians 6:9). “But ye, brethren, be not weary in well doing” (2 Thessalonians 3:13). Do you think that in these verses Paul is telling his readers to stop their “well doing”? No, I believe he is encouraging them to continue even though what they are doing can cause weariness and a desire to “faint,” or, in other words, quit. It appears to me, from these verses, that weariness is a choice on my part. It doesn’t have to do with my activities or lack of them, as long as the Lord has directed me to do them, but rather it relates to my thoughts about myself and what I am doing. I can choose to be weary and faint by thinking about me and a quest for my time. I can choose not to be weary and not to faint by thinking about the reason I work, the recipients of my work, the outcome of my work, and the One Who called me to work. I reap what I sow—weariness or joy.

“Whereunto I also labour, striving according to his working, which worketh in me mightily” (Colossians 1:29). Scripture has many verses that indicate a believer’s life is filled with work. This is one example. With the kind of labor and striving pictured here, I envision the verses in Matthew 11 about the yoke. When I am yoked with Christ, He is working in me and with me. It is not a labor and striving unto weariness, but rather it is one of might and victory.

As homeschooling moms, our days are filled with the duties of being a keeper at home plus teaching our children. I have to make a decision: do I want to serve myself, or do I want to serve Jesus by serving my family? When I serve myself, I grapple for free time and relaxation. When I serve Jesus, I commit to doing what He has called me to do, focusing on rest for my soul through my relationship with Him, but receiving rest for my body when He brings it to me. I believe as we view our mothering roles as being ones that involve work and have the right attitudes toward this, we will be happy. “Ye call me Master and Lord: and ye say well; for so I am. If I then, your Lord and Master, have washed your feet; ye also ought to wash one another’s feet. For I have given you an example, that ye should do as I have done to you. Verily, verily, I say unto you, The servant is not greater than his lord; neither he that is sent greater than he that sent him. If ye know these things, happy are ye if ye do them” (John 13:13-17).

What About Me? – Part 1

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Here is a portion of an e-mail I recently received:

“I am a homeschooling mother (31) of five children (ages 13 years, 12 years, 10 years, 6 years, and 21 months) and a pastor’s wife. I can never sit down at the end of the day, have an accomplished feeling, and say ’My job is done for the day.’ I feel so burdened and pulled from so many directions. My house is pretty organized. My children have chores. They are very good kids, and we have many compliments on them. People seem to just adore our family, yet I feel so?!? I do love my family and would not trade it for the world. It just seems so hard keeping up all the time. When I turn my attention toward one thing, another is lacking; children, husband, housework, church, ladies meetings . . . How about just relaxing or fun??? What’s that? It’s like there is not enough of me to get it all done. I am not a lazy person. I work too hard, wear down, and get frustrated. It’s like a cycle.” A tired homeschool mom (used by permission)

This is a typical e-mail for me to find in my inbox. It forthrightly and honestly speaks of the reality of a homeschooling lifestyle. I can personally relate to this mom’s thoughts and feelings because I have had to deal with them myself. Because of these struggles, I have taken my questions to the Lord to seek His truth. I wanted to understand what He says about this rather than what others—even homeschool moms—might say.

Through my over twenty years of homeschooling, I find a propensity within homeschool circles, when faced with the issues this mom raises, to give advice along the lines of: slow down, find an easier curriculum, do less school, go easy on yourself, don’t expect too much of yourself or the children, take a break, and get housekeeping help. Any of these might be the solution to this mom’s problems. However, I have discovered a difficult, but exciting, truth in my study of Scripture as it relates to being a homeschool mom. This Scriptural direction does not endorse the same counsel that we tend to like to give each other; I, too, am quite prone to want to give encouragement in the direction of easing up. Instead, the Word takes a consistently strong stand on what I have come to see is, plainly and simply, hard work.

During my Bible reading time, I went through the New Testament with an eye for verses that applied to what our expectations as homeschooling moms should be considering the workload we face. How much work should we have to do? Can I expect to have personal time to do what I want to do? What about taking care of me? What does Scripture have to say that would apply to these types of questions?

As I made my study, I looked for verses that indicated I was entitled to fun, entertainment, relaxation, or some kind of focus on me. I wouldn’t have minded finding some Biblical admonition for this propensity of my flesh. I have to admit I was disappointed, but not surprised, not to be able to discover any verses that applied. I found many verses that had to do with being a servant, dying to self, and taking up my cross. However, I didn’t find one verse that mentioned or even alluded to fun, entertainment, or relaxation.

Verses I felt applied to having time for myself were ones that dealt with spiritual growth, such as, “Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth” (2 Timothy 2:15). Or, “But grow in grace, and in the knowledge of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ. To him be glory both now and for ever” (2 Peter 3:18). From these kinds of verses I could glean the importance of having time set aside in my day to spend with the Lord, reading the Word, praying, and memorizing Scripture. This wasn’t specifically stated, but rather it was implied because of the outcome to be gained. Time for Teri was to be spent allowing the Lord Jesus to spiritually teach, grow, and nurture me. I couldn’t find where it was to be selfishly spent doing what I wanted to do.

I am not saying that as homeschool moms we can never do something we enjoy for ourselves or that we can never relax. What I am trying to convey is that in Scripture we find a different picture than the world gives us of our role as mothers and our workload. The world’s view of work, almost any kind of work, is that it is to be accomplished as quickly as possible so that we are free to pursue our personal pleasures. That kind of pleasure is all the world has for which to live. When my expectations become set on having to have time for my own entertainment, I find myself grappling for what doesn’t satisfy and disappointed in the process. My focus becomes myself, easily filled with self-pity in what I might be missing and dissatisfaction with what I am accomplishing, much like the e-mail you just read in the beginning of this Mom’s Corner.

The Lord Jesus is telling me through His Word that my focus is not to be on how to get time for fun. Instead it is to be on Himself. John 15 tells me that I am to abide in Him, and He in me. When my thoughts are on Him, then my heart wants to be obedient more than it wants to serve self and be free of its workload. In the midst of that obedience comes the hard work associated with serving others, giving of my time and energy, and actually dying to self. However, with that sacrifice come the joy and contentment Paul talks about in Philippians 4.

In the next months, I want to continue looking into the workload of a homeschooling mom and our expectations. I plan to share particular verses that helped me deal with my thoughts and attitudes about this. May we each be a mom who chooses to obediently follow Jesus Christ, having a servant’s heart, without listening to the lies of the world.

Homeschooling with a Meek and Quiet Spirit has been an encouragement to many moms (even non homeschoolers) as they seek to have the spirit that God desires us to exhibit. I share from many years of experience and what the Lord has taught me and is continuing to teach me. An accompanying study guide is also available. Quite a few ladies are using the book and guide as a group study.

Children’s Chores

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Children and chores. I wonder if there is any more difficult area of raising children to tackle than this one. In the chore survey we sent out with the June Corners, we gathered a huge quantity of information about chores. In a nutshell, from the questions we asked, here is a summary. Most moms weren’t prepared, while growing up, to be homemakers. Consequently, they have struggled–some greatly–with taking care of their families and homes. A handful of the respondents were prepared. Those who were prepared attribute it to having to do chores when they were children.

Chores Are Beneficial to Children

Every one of the over 250 survey respondents believed that chores were beneficial for the children and the family. The list of reasons why chores are good was long and varied. Some of the benefits were current for the child, the family, and the home. Many of the benefits would be realized and enjoyed throughout the adult years of the child’s life.

From the survey, the biggest difficulty with chores was first working with children–having to remind them, their negative attitudes, and their poor work. The second major problem was Mom’s lack of consistency–in developing a chore plan, in scheduling time for chores, in checking the work that was done, and in giving consequences for a bad job and rewards for good work.

The chore poll confirmed what we already knew: that chores are important in our children’s lives, and chores need to be made a priority in our homes. In our culture, with its “let children be children” philosophy, it is easy to believe we are doing our children a disservice by expecting them to have responsibility as they are growing up. In reality, the opposite is true. If we choose not to give our children chores and teach them to accomplish them well, we are handicapping our children for their futures as adults. There are a multitude of long-term benefits our children will realize from the disciplines and skills they will develop as a result of chore responsibilities.

Chore Consistency

At one point, Steve and I realized our struggles with many unsuccessful years of chores had come because we wanted our children to be responsible for their chores, but we hadn’t made it the priority it needed to be to ensure that it happened. As is so often true of anything good we want to accomplish in our children’s lives, it comes back to Mom. If I don’t have an accepting attitude toward my work, the children won’t toward theirs. If I don’t assign the children chores, they won’t do any. If I don’t schedule a time for them to do chores, they will forget all day. If I don’t check their work, they will do it sloppily, if at all. If I don’t give consequences, they won’t be motivated to improve their chore performance.

To be honest, I would like it if so much didn’t depend on me. At the same time, I know the Lord uses all of this not only in my children’s lives, but also in my life. I am told in Galatians 6:9, “And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.” Even if this part of motherhood is difficult, I am not to give up. I am not to grow weary.

I have to admit I have wanted to give up–more than once! I can remember telling Steve that perhaps I could let the children grow up but keep their bedroom doors closed and never go in. I would ignore the fact that they weren’t doing what they had been assigned to do in their rooms. Eventually they would be adults. It would no longer be my responsibility as to whether they picked up their bedrooms or didn’t. Even while speaking those words, I knew this was not an option the Lord was putting before me. He had told me in Titus 2:4 to love my children. Part of loving them was the necessity of teaching them to be responsible.

This area of children and chores is vitally important. As we have studied chores and their impact on children’s lives and then on them as adults, we have come to see that chores are as critical as homeschooling is. It is as essential a part of their education as their book work. Being aware of the benefits of chores is a major part of the necessary motivation to make the daily decisions that will foster chore success.

My encouragement to you is to make chores a priority for your children. Consider chores as much a part of your child’s education as his math book is. When you view chores in this light, you will be motivated to invest the time and energy needed to be successful with chores. After all, it does mostly fall back on us moms. Will we women, who seek the best for our children, hold them responsible to do their chores?

We now have available a book with a ChorePack Kit all about chores and helping you make your chore system: Managers of Their Chores: A Practical Guide to Children's Chores.

Benefits of Summer Scheduling

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One of the main cries of my heart to homeschooling moms is to encourage them to use a daily schedule. Scheduling is at the heart and soul of what has made our home and homeschool successful. I find I have to proclaim the joys of scheduling from the rooftops from time to time, especially after having regular e-mails from struggling homeschooling moms.

With the freedom from school hours that summer brings for many homeschool families comes the ability to fit in many new activities, projects, and tasks. What I have also discovered comes with my summer release from school responsibility is a propensity to laziness and self-focus. Those looked-forward-to free hours fritter away day by day, week by week. When school starts again, I look back on my summer with a heart filled with regrets and if only’s.

The solution the Lord has given me is to use my schedule to help productively use my summer hours and my children’s. I still have freedom from the school responsibility and hours. However, I will accomplish all those tasks and goals that I anticipated through the school year. I can pray about my summer schedule, seeking the Lord’s guidance for priorities. Then I discuss the schedule possibilities with my husband to get his direction for how my summer should be spent plus what we want the children to do with their time.

Two years ago, I wrote a Mom’s Corner on summer schedules. I am not going to repeat that information, but I would encourage you to read that article. I also suggest you read this Mom’s Corner about children and chores during the summer.

I wanted to give you some other thoughts regarding summer schedules from those who have begun implementing this idea in their homes. These suggestions from other homeschooling moms will give you motivation for your summer scheduling, plus some great ideas.

From: Mom A
There have been only a few summers in our past that we did not do school. The summers that we took a real “break” were freeing, BUT the short-lived freedom was not worth it in the long run.

It may have been glorious at the moment, but …

1) it took us FOREVER to get back into the swing of things once we did begin.
2) one of my children seemed to forget every item learned the previous year, which meant a LOT of review when we began.
3) the first day we started, I felt behind already!
4) the mind is a great thing to waste; no school meant more TV when it was too hot to play outside.
5) without a focus or a sense of accomplishing something, we were floating around aimlessly.
6) due to the mental laziness, NOTHING got done that year.
7) I spent more money that summer due to being out and about so much, which caused guilt on my part of not being a frugal helpmeet, and then the guilt snowballed into a fear of turning into the worst wife in the world.
8) we ate a lot of fast food since I was too lethargic from all my remorse to cook consistently.

IT WAS A TERRIBLE EXPERIENCE TO NOT DO SOME SCHOOL DURING THE SUMMER! I’m sure that you gathered this already! I have our summer schedule for this year already written out and discussed with my children!!

From: Mom B
We schedule gardening in 30 minutes segments. One in the morning after the daily housework is done, about 9:30, and one right after quiet time, at 3:30. We usually start school at 10:00 if we are doing school, and if we are on summer break they do just handwriting or copy work, nature journals and arts and crafts kind of things. They usually play from 11:15 to 12:30 before lunch, and 4:30 to 6:00 before supper.

My children like it when I read to them after lunch and again before bedtime. If I were going to include learning a language, it would probably be in the afternoon as part of their quiet time, maybe using a computer program or tapes. This would be after they had some quiet reading time in their own room.

From: Mom C
To homeschool to enjoy the summer, I use the same exact principles as I do for a “regular” schedule. I decide when and how long to “school,” then I am done. I decide when and how long to garden, etc. I give what I want to do a slot, and I faithfully do what I scheduled. Then by the summer’s end, I will feel as if I have accomplished what I really wanted to, instead of feeling as if the time was wasted. I LOVE having a summer schedule in place. It really can be a time to accomplish a lot. Our reading quiet times are before bed and before baby’s naptime.

From: Mom D
We have a summer schedule with chores, Bible reading (God doesn’t take the summer off), and an hour or more of school. Usually everyone does math, and then the children work in whatever subjects they are poor in. For some, that may be just practicing their reading. For others, they have to repeat a course they did poorly in. We spend 60 minutes per day in the garden, usually early in the day. I leave the afternoons unscheduled. We still do weekly projects, but they are usually outside work. We keep the school-year rules of only 30 minutes of computer per day, which they have to earn by doing a typing lesson first and not scoring below a set level of words/errors per minute.

Buy board games, and provide arts and crafts supplies. At our home if the children say, “I’m bored” or something equivalent, they get a job from the project list. If they act like they are at loose ends, I suggest something fun or creative. The suggestion MUST be taken and usually after the first few minutes, they get into it and enjoy themselves. This has taught them all to be productive and not to mope around or Mom finds them something to do.

From: Mom E
We do school in the summer but only the things we think the children need extra work in, like handwriting, or things they really enjoy, like reading. We also do math facts practice so they don’t forget it over the summer. All of that probably takes about 20 minutes. We are doing our state history this summer just to prevent the day being too long during the regular year. We also do Bible every day whether we do school or not. Each person also has time for individual time in the Word each day.

I’m filling up our schedule with things like gardening, project time, playing outside, computer time, educational games, time with each parent, time with each other (we have 2 children) and time spent playing alone. We recently discovered that our eleven-year-old couldn’t play alone. He is the younger of the two and had never had to play by himself. He had no idea what to do, so we added alone time each day to his schedule so he can learn to play or work on his own.

Once we add in daily and weekly chore times and piano practice, our schedule is pretty full. Of course, we do have meal times, family time, and family devotions each day as well.

From: Mom F
We plan on having our regular morning routine this summer, which includes: Wake, dress, groom, daily chores, breakfast, and cleanup. Then we will have our Bible time and an hour of “school.” We are going to do reading, educational games, and math drills. I plan on having the older children help me with the younger ones for activities such as listening to them read and playing games with them. After this time, they will get outside time until lunch. After lunch, we will have rest and reading time, and then I plan to have a project time. They will get free time again until supper.

Do you see how these moms are using their schedules to make sure they are having productive summers? I love the change of pace our summer months provide. However, I dislike looking back on those weeks and feeling they were wasted. A schedule gives us freedom: freedom to accomplish what the Lord wants me and my children to do with those summer hours. From reading about how these other moms are using their summer schedules, I believe you will glean ideas for your own schedule. I encourage you to make a summer schedule. If you need help with how to schedule, the Managers of Their Homes book is a how-to primer on scheduling for homeschool families, including a chapter on summer scheduling. Use your summer schedule to be profitable with your summer days. Look back on those weeks with no regrets.

A Voice for Homeschool Christian Textbooks

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I read your article in the Mom’s Corner on using Christian textbooks in the homeschool.

I deeply appreciate you writing that. I’m always reading articles that balk at using textbooks in the homeschool with the idea that children don’t really learn.

Well, I fell prey to that and have tried many different curriculums, unit studies, you name it. But, I typically wasn’t able to get it all together like I should have. When I did, my children didn’t respond well to it. So, all my hard work in searching for something “fun” and putting it all together myself was in vain. I have tried so many different things and wish I had stayed with the traditional Christian textbooks since I just keep coming back to them anyway.

After thousands of dollars spent on trying different methods and curriculums, I’m back to Christian texts, where I plan on staying! 🙂 I wish I knew then when I started homeschooling what I know now . . . I’d have saved a lot of money and wasted time. A homeschool mom

We hear few voices in the homeschooling community supporting, encouraging, or defending the use of traditional, Christian textbooks. I wrote a Mom’s Corner two years ago about our experiences through years of homeschooling with various curricula. I was overwhelmed with the gratitude that was expressed by moms who had felt guilty for using textbooks in their homeschooling because there is little, if any, endorsement for their choice. As in the earlier Corner on this topic, this article is for those using traditional Christian textbooks or for those who are dissatisfied with the homeschool method they are using. For others, this Corner doesn’t apply to you, and we would suggest you not read it. We don’t want this article to discourage anyone in the way that anti-textbook articles often discourage a textbook-using homeschool mom.

It is common to pick up a homeschooling book or magazine to discover it is speaking negatively about the use of textbooks. We are told we are creating a “school-at-home” atmosphere by using books, something they say no homeschooler should do. In the chapter or article, homeschoolers will be encouraged to make their schools fun and enticing so their children will enjoy learning. They are told that their children will naturally want to learn if the schooling is directed toward the areas of the child’s interest. We hear about the importance of reading whole books to our children rather than textbooks. All of this appeals to our motherly desire for our children to be happy. In the process, though, it often, perhaps inadvertently, puts a great burden of guilt on a mom who doesn’t choose to homeschool like this.

Homeschool Textbooks Prepare Children for Life

Steve and I have realized that we have a different philosophy for our homeschool than many of these other homeschool authors apparently have. We want our homeschool to be a vehicle to prepare our children for life. This life that we envision for our children when they are adults will entail diligence and perseverance. As adults, they will often be called upon to learn something that isn’t particularly interesting to them. Even if something they learn catches their attention, the educational aspect of the topic will most likely not be exciting or enticing.

Our Christian textbooks are the perfect tools for achieving our goal of preparing children for their adult lives. There will be parts of the textbooks that appeal to the children and parts that they dislike. The children will catch on to some of their textbook work quickly and easily, while other sections will be difficult and tedious. We want our children to be able to learn under all these circumstances because this is exactly what they will face as adults in a grown-up world.

Using a traditional Christian textbook approach to homeschool allows our schooling to be consistent. I have received many e-mails from homeschooling moms who use other homeschool methods and are always pushing harder and harder to make school fun and exciting. When Mom’s energy level falls, she feels like a failure because she isn’t able to supply the enticement that makes the children love what they are doing. She wears herself out gathering information, supplies, planning her studies, and looking for better materials to help her keep school such that her children will be delighted with it. In this scenario, because Mom is often exhausted and discouraged, school regularly ends up being skipped, with the children playing, while Mom feels guilty and retreats to other less demanding tasks.

With the textbooks we use, we simply move through them day by day, making slow and steady progress. I don’t have to make continual trips to the library and other places for fresh school supplies. I can focus my energy on our actual schooling because we are at home. School doesn’t depend on whether or not I have had time to plan for it. We just do whatever comes next in the book. I am not required to come up with creative presentations to keep the children interested enough in their school that they are willing to do whatever Mom has for them to do. We just do school every day.

School is Consistent with Homeschool Textbooks

We have found great accountability for our homeschool in traditional Christian textbooks. Without this accountability, it is easy to skip school for almost any reason that comes along. However, we want to finish our school books by the end of our school year or even before, so we count the cost of missing a school day. With our textbooks, even on days that I need to be away for one reason or another, the children can still accomplish the majority, if not all, of their school work. They know what to do, we have been doing it consistently, and they can do it on their own.

Traditional Christian textbooks have given our children a strong education. This is partly due to the regularity of our schooling and partly due to the textbooks themselves. Because textbooks present their material in a structured, repetitive manner, the children are receiving an excellent education. It has appeared to us that often there are “holes” in other homeschooling methods. We used unit studies for almost ten years of our homeschooling. Our older children have repeatedly told us that they believe their younger siblings have a better-quality education than they had, although we diligently covered all of the material suggested.

Even using Christian textbooks, we are cautious of the influences they will present in our children’s lives and look for the right texts for our family’s needs and the direction the Lord has set for us. For example, our children have chosen not to have dating relationships. One Christian high school level English book had a dating theme, so we eliminated it for our family. We prefer to spend our time in Bible reading and ministering to others rather than in sports. Therefore, we don’t want a major sports theme in the children’s school books, although we have found this hard to avoid altogether. We have seen worldly and silly selections in some Christian reading and literature courses. We have instead chosen the reading courses without those focuses.

Our Christian textbooks have helped us fulfill our goal of keeping our children innocent regarding evil. We don’t want to introduce them to false religions through their school studies. “Take heed to thyself that thou be not snared by following them, after that they be destroyed from before thee; and that thou enquire not after their gods, saying, How did these nations serve their gods? even so will I do likewise” (Deuteronomy 12:30). “. . . I would have you wise unto that which is good, and simple concerning evil” (Romans 16:19). Many homeschooling materials will study false beliefs in depth with the idea that the parents are to point out what is wrong with them. We see Scripture telling us that we are not to learn about them at all. Christian textbooks will give some general information about false religions in history books, but we have found it is easy to edit, with white-out, what is unacceptable for the children to know at their age. We feel it is appropriate for them to read that the Egyptians worshipped false gods but not that they know names and details of those religious practices.

Managing Homeschool Textbooks

Despite using Christian textbooks, I still need to invest time in our homeschool. I spend several hours a day meeting with each child individually-from a half hour to an hour per child-going over their schoolwork. We will read the math lesson together and work the new practice problems. We read the English lesson and make sure that the assignment is understood. Anything the child needs help with or that I want to make sure he understands, I go over with him during that time. In the afternoon, I have time set aside to check the children’s school work. For five children, this takes me a total of about an hour to an hour and a half. I also spend time during the summer dividing up our textbooks and making assignment sheets to be sure we complete our books within the number of weeks we will be doing school.

When I was brave enough to realize that I didn’t agree with so much of the writing and talk in the homeschool movement about what was a good way to homeschool, I discovered the joys of homeschooling with Christian textbooks. My hope for this Mom’s Corner is to support those who have chosen a traditional, Christian textbook approach to homeschooling. I would also like to recommend this homeschooling method to moms who are dissatisfied with what they are doing for their school. We love our textbooks, and they are accomplishing our educational goals for our children.

Since this article was written, we now have a book titled Managers of Their Schools: A Practical Guide to Homeschooling. The book is full of practical information about the nuts and bolts of homeschooling, along with a chapter written by our four oldest children.

Children’s and Family Bible Time

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Sometimes in the course of parenting, we are given sound advice in the raising of children. Other times, the counsel offered is not the path to take. Sadly, it may only be the course of time that leads one to discover whether there was value in the words that were spoken. Steve and I found ourselves in this kind of difficulty, when it came to reading the Bible with the children, as we raised our first three who are now adults. We listened to the wrong encouragement. We were given another opportunity with our five younger children, having the benefit of spiritual growth in us as parents. We also had more experience in learning to listen to the Lord instead of listening to others.

When our older children were young, we were told that preschoolers couldn’t understand the Bible. It was simply too difficult for them. The words were too hard. The concepts were above their heads. The Bible wouldn’t hold their attention. Spiritual training, according to these voices, was not to be neglected, though. We were encouraged to make the Bible real to our young children by reading them books with stories that were easy to understand, exciting, fun, and enticing for young eyes and minds with oodles of colorful illustrations. Most said that our preschoolers needed easy-to-understand materials like picture Bibles or books that had one verse and then a story connected with the verse. There were plenty of these books available, so that’s what we started using for our Bible time with our children.

Although our Kindergarten-age oldest son was praised by a teacher for his Bible knowledge, gleaned from a picture Bible, we never felt like we were quite hitting the mark in our children’s spiritual nurturing when we used these types of materials. The children enjoyed them, no doubt. We spent beneficial time together with our children as we read from these books. Where was the spiritual meat, though? Could it really be that pictures illustrating God’s truth or paraphrased stories were able to convey the same truth and wisdom found in the Word? Did these children’s materials have the power of the Bible in them?

As our children became older, the Lord was pulling our hearts away from the fluff of other books for family Bible time. It took a few intermediate steps from picture Bibles, but eventually we moved to using the Bible for Bible time. What a novel idea! Of course, by now our older children were well into their elementary grades and could be expected, even by those who liked to give suggestions, to start understanding some of what was read from the Bible.

In our large family, using Bibles for family time meant that our youngest children—who were then babies, toddlers, and preschoolers—were involved in Bible time using real Bibles. We were amazed. We were shocked. We were dumbfounded. Our preschoolers most certainly weren’t fitting the model set out earlier for us. They liked Bible time with the family and with Bibles. Our little children could understand much of what we were reading. They would ask questions about what they didn’t understand. They did great. When Mary was four years old—long before she could read—she would still participate in our family’s tradition at the end of our Bible reading. After reading the chapter for that night, each family member picks out a verse that applies to his life in some way and shares it with the rest of the family.

Mary would listen as the chapter was read and understand it well enough to know which verse she wanted to pick. She even had a system to be able to tell us her verse number. She would identify the family member who read the verse she was choosing. She would then count around the room, since we each read two verses until the chapter ended—sometimes her verse was read on the second round—to determine the verse number. Then she would tell us the verse number and articulate the personal application from what had been read in that verse. That is pretty amazing for a very normal four-year-old if preschoolers can’t understand the Bible!

Scripture gives us a good basis for reading the Bible with our children and teaching them from it. “And that from a child thou hast known the holy scriptures, which are able to make thee wise unto salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus. All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness: That the man of God may be perfect, throughly furnished unto all good works” (2 Timothy 3:15-17). I don’t know exactly how Timothy was taught. However, when this verse says that he has “known the holy scriptures” from a child, I don’t think he was learning from any popular Jewish children’s picture books of the time. I believe he was being taught directly from Scripture. Look at these verses and the power we see in God’s Word—even for a child. Strong’s Concordance indicates that the word “child” is actually a baby or young child. Timothy’s instruction from the Bible began when he was very young.

In this process of what to use for Bible time with young children, consider the appetites that are developed. When we give our children Bible story books and picture Bibles rather than real Bibles for family Bible reading, are we developing a love in their hearts for God’s Word? Are we teaching them that God’s Word is the very sustenance of their lives? Are we giving them a comfort level that they can and should learn and understand the Word? Are children’s picture Bibles “profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness”? Are they “. . . quick, and powerful, and sharper than any twoedged sword, piercing even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the joints and marrow, and . . . is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart” (Hebrews 4:12)?

We experienced firsthand the consequences of using picture Bibles, story books, and cute devotionals for Bible time. We had created an appetite in our three older children for those kinds of materials. They much preferred something with a story and a picture in it to the Word itself. They weren’t excited when Steve said we were going to begin reading the Bible. They wanted a story from one of their other books or children’s devotionals. It was a process to help them develop a love for the Word and to let go of wanting it to be entertaining.

Our younger children haven’t had this problem with bad appetites being developed in them regarding Bible reading. Instead they have had positive appetites instilled in them. They have grown up with real Bibles and have been a part of the family reading the Bible together. They have been able to understand the Word without needing pictures and stories. Some have participated in family Bible time since the day they were born, once we had instituted reading the Bible with the children. God’s inspired Word has filled their minds and consequently taught their hearts from infancy. They truly love God’s Word.

I would encourage you to consider these thoughts as you plan what to use in your family Bible time and preschool Bible time. We pray that our experience, both negative and positive, would give you information to help you see the value of using Bibles even with young children. May we be moms who love the Word so much that nothing can be substituted for it in the lives of our children.

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The Influence of a Mother’s Example

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Last night as I pulled back the sheets to get into bed, I heard a flutter of paper. I found a handwritten note nestled between the sheet and the pillow. It read, “Dear Mom, You are doing a good job with healthy eating. You are a good mommy. I love you very much.” There was a note on Daddy’s pillow too. I have received several encouragement notes from my children lately.

You may remember the Corner where I shared the Lord’s conviction in my heart concerning writing words of blessing and encouragement to my children. I have only been doing that regularly for a few months now, but I believe it has been motivating the children to begin writing their own encouragement notes. There were many reasons I saw for writing my children notes of blessing. I was surprised, though, by this unexpected benefit of the children beginning, on their own, to write encouragement notes to other family members.

As I have been pondering this surprise outcome of my note writing, I have become once again aware of the importance of a mother’s example to her children. I am reminded that Paul wanted to use his example positively in the lives of those whom he was teaching. “Those things, which ye have both learned, and received, and heard, and seen in me, do: and the God of peace shall be with you” (Philippians 4:9). Paul also showed the power of example when he was admonishing Timothy, “Let no man despise thy youth; but be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation, in charity, in spirit, in faith, in purity” (1 Timothy 4:12). I believe we want to use the influence of our example in our children’s lives in these positive ways as well.

Sometimes our example to our children is a negative one, which can be very discouraging to us. Scripture gives us direction for how to handle those areas of our lives that would be bad examples to our children. A quick overview would include several Scriptures. 1 John 1:9 tells us, “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” We are also to battle our sin and not yield ourselves to it. “Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us” (Hebrews 12:1). “Neither yield ye your members as instruments of unrighteousness unto sin: but yield yourselves unto God, as those that are alive from the dead, and your members as instruments of righteousness unto God” (Romans 6:13).

We are not told in Scripture to dwell on our sin or make it a focus, as we might be prone to do. We are not to feel sorry for ourselves over our sin. I have recently discovered something much better than feeling self-pity—which comes easily for me—for my sin. I can rejoice that the Holy Spirit convicts me of sin rather than just letting me tolerate it. We repent, confess sin, pray for grace to overcome it, and yield ourselves to God.

Our minds are to be on our Lord Jesus Christ. That is where the affirmative example begins. “If ye then be risen with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ sitteth on the right hand of God. Set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth” (Colossians 3:1-2). Simply by following this one direction, we will be a good example for our children. The intent of our hearts’ desire for our example might be defined by this verse: “That ye might walk worthy of the Lord unto all pleasing, being fruitful in every good work, and increasing in the knowledge of God” (Colossians 1:10).

We can ask ourselves questions that would help us determine the example we want to set for our children. Do we want them to read the Word and learn from it? “Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path” (Psalms 119:105). Then we would evaluate our lives to see if we are setting that example for them. Do we believe prayer is vital in our walk with Jesus Christ? “Pray without ceasing” (1 Thessalonians 5:17). A part of how a prayer life is developed in our children’s lives is by our example. Do we want our children to “Rejoice in the Lord always . . .” (Philippians 4:4)? If so, then we can’t be complainers and grumblers. That would be the negative example being observed.

Several years ago, Steve and I realized that we wanted more often and more verbally to be expressing our love for our children. As part of keeping our children’s hearts (see our book, Keeping Our Children’s Hearts), we knew the value of them always being keenly aware of our love for them. We began making an effort to tell each of them how much we loved him or her. We told them that several times throughout the day. Do you know what one result of that was that we hadn’t expected? The children began saying they loved us more and also expressing their love for each other verbally. We didn’t admonish them to do this. We didn’t give it to them as an assignment. We set an example.

Where are our hearts? What kind of example are we setting? The Lord Jesus has given us as mothers a wonderful assignment in raising our children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord (Ephesians 6:4). Our example can help or hinder in that assignment. We have many opportunities each day to be examples to our children. May we be like Paul and choose to be the kind of example that will spiritually lead our children to Jesus Christ and to obedience to Him. “But thou hast fully known my doctrine, manner of life, purpose, faith, longsuffering, charity, patience” (2 Timothy 3:10). Could we say the same?

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Praying Scripture for Our Children

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Praying for our children is a high spiritual priority in the life of Christian mothers. We know that the work of spiritual growth in our children’s lives is accomplished by the power of the Lord Jesus. “For it is God which worketh in you both to will and to do of his good pleasure” (Philippians 2:13). As an example for us in praying for our children, we have many Scriptures that tell us that Paul prayed for his spiritual children without ceasing and with thanksgiving. If we are to invest heavily in prayer for our children, what exactly will we pray?

“For the word of God is quick, and powerful, and sharper than any twoedged sword, piercing even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart” (Hebrews 4:12). “All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness: That the man of God may be perfect, throughly furnished unto all good works” (2 Timothy 3:16-17). I believe these verses show us that Scripture is an excellent basis for some of our prayers for our children.

My two favorite Scriptures for prayer are ones Paul prayed. “For this cause I bow my knees unto the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, Of whom the whole family in heaven and earth is named, That he would grant you, according to the riches of his glory, to be strengthened with might by his Spirit in the inner man; That Christ may dwell in your hearts by faith; that ye, being rooted and grounded in love, May be able to comprehend with all saints what is the breadth, and length, and depth, and height; And to know the love of Christ, which passeth knowledge, that ye might be filled with all the fulness of God. Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us, Unto him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus throughout all ages, world without end. Amen” (Ephesians 3:14-21).

“For this cause we also, since the day we heard it, do not cease to pray for you, and to desire that ye might be filled with the knowledge of his will in all wisdom and spiritual understanding; That ye might walk worthy of the Lord unto all pleasing, being fruitful in every good work, and increasing in the knowledge of God; Strengthened with all might, according to his glorious power, unto all patience and longsuffering with joyfulness; Giving thanks unto the Father, which hath made us meet to be partakers of the inheritance of the saints in light: Who hath delivered us from the power of darkness, and hath translated us into the kingdom of his dear Son” (Colossians 1:9-13).

Do we want our children to choose righteousness over sin? Then praying from Romans 6 would be worthwhile. “Let not sin therefore reign in your mortal body, that ye should obey it in the lusts thereof. Neither yield ye your members as instruments of unrighteousness unto sin: but yield yourselves unto God, as those that are alive from the dead, and your members as instruments of righteousness unto God” (Romans 6:12-13).

Is your child struggling with worry? You can pray Philippians 4:6-7 for him. “Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God. And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.”

Does your child lack a thankful heart? Consider praying that your child would begin, “Giving thanks always for all things unto God and the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ” (Ephesians 5:20).

Do you realize how Scripture can be used to pray for our children? No matter what need you see in your child’s life, you can find a Scripture to pray that will relate to that need. If you desire growth in your child in a certain spiritual direction, you can look for Scripture to pray that will support and endorse this growth.

I have begun to memorize the verses that I am praying for my children so that I have them available any time I want them. I can pick out portions of the verses to pray, and I can individualize them by putting my child’s name into the words from Scripture as I pray. I have found that everything I memorize to pray for my children is applicable to praying for myself and others as well.

There are some things that I pray for my children day after day, prayer after prayer. Should I stop praying them because I have prayed them so many times? “And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not” (Galatians 6:9). My repetitive prayers for my children fall into this category of what I am not to become weary in doing because, in time, there will be a harvest of spiritual fruit.

“And he spake a parable unto them to this end, that men ought always to pray, and not to faint; Saying, There was in a city a judge, which feared not God, neither regarded man: And there was a widow in that city; and she came unto him, saying, Avenge me of mine adversary. And he would not for a while: but afterward he said within himself, Though I fear not God, nor regard man; Yet because this widow troubleth me, I will avenge her, lest by her continual coming she weary me. And the Lord said, Hear what the unjust judge saith. And shall not God avenge his own elect, which cry day and night unto him, though he bear long with them? I tell you that he will avenge them speedily. Nevertheless when the Son of man cometh, shall he find faith on the earth?” (Luke 18:1-8). This parable gives the example that we are to continue crying out to our Lord Jesus Christ in prayer for our children, even if we pray the same or similar things for them very often.

When I pray Scripture for my children, I feel assured in my heart that I am praying God’s will and desire for them. “And whatsoever ye shall ask in my name, that will I do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son. If ye shall ask any thing in my name, I will do it” (John 14:13-14). “And this is the confidence that we have in him, that, if we ask any thing according to his will, he heareth us: And if we know that he hear us, whatsoever we ask, we know that we have the petitions that we desired of him” (1 John 5:14-15).

As you commit your heart to pray for your children, I encourage you to use Scripture as part of those prayers. Memorize the passages that the Lord directs you to pray for your children so that you will have them available anywhere and anytime to pray. Then be faithful in spending much time in prayer for your children.

Praying for Our Children

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As Steve and I continue down this parenting path the Lord started us on twenty-eight years ago, we become more and more convinced of the necessity of prayer for our children. Reading through the New Testament recently, I was reminded of the example Paul has set for us in his prayer life. I believe we can learn much from Paul that will apply to us as moms praying for our children.

Paul prayed constantly for the churches and individuals to whom he wrote. Please bear with me in reading through all of the following verses, because I believe they powerfully show us the heart and passion of a man committed to his spiritual children as we want to be committed to our natural children.

“First, I thank my God through Jesus Christ for you all, that your faith is spoken of throughout the whole world. For God is my witness, whom I serve with my spirit in the gospel of his Son, that without ceasing I make mention of you always in my prayers” (Romans 1:8-9).

“Cease not to give thanks for you, making mention of you in my prayers” (Ephesians 1:16).

“We give thanks to God and the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, praying always for you” (Colossians 1:3).

“We give thanks to God always for you all, making mention of you in our prayers” (1 Thessalonians 1:2).

“Wherefore also we pray always for you, that our God would count you worthy of this calling, and fulfil all the good pleasure of his goodness, and the work of faith with power: That the name of our Lord Jesus Christ may be glorified in you, and ye in him, according to the grace of our God and the Lord Jesus Christ” (2 Thessalonians 1:11-12).

“I thank God, whom I serve from my forefathers with pure conscience, that without ceasing I have remembrance of thee in my prayers night and day” (2 Timothy 1:3).

“I thank my God, making mention of thee always in my prayers” (Philemon 1:4).

“I thank my God upon every remembrance of you, Always in every prayer of mine for you all making request with joy, For your fellowship in the gospel from the first day until now; Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ” (Philippians 1:3-6).

Paul knows that his example is a positive one: “Those things, which ye have both learned, and received, and heard, and seen in me, do: and the God of peace shall be with you” (Philippians 4:9). Yet, look where his dependence remains in his heart’s desire for his spiritual children to grow in holiness and godliness. He is continually lifting his churches and converts to Jesus in prayer. He isn’t relying on his own wisdom, strength, or example. He knows his total dependence on the Lord and the dependence his “children” will need as well. It would seem to me that of all teachers, Paul would have had the least need of anyone to spend that amount of time and energy in prayer. However, he was completely aware of his weakness and the weakness of those he loved. He was continually crying out to the Lord for those “children.” Isn’t that true in our lives and our children’s lives as well—aren’t we all weak and needy?

Strong’s Concordance tells us that “without ceasing” means exactly that: “without intermission, incessantly, without ceasing.” “Always” means “at all times, always, ever.” To me these verses and words indicate a mind preoccupied with prayer. Are we praying for our children when we wake up in the morning, when we are working, when we are with them, when we are doing school, when we are in the car, when we go to bed at night, when they are struggling, when they are disobedient, when they are unkind, when they are peaceful, when they are helpful—without ceasing?

My tendency is to make excuses for my lack of prayerfulness. I am too busy. I can’t do school and pray for the children at the same time. I have a one-track mind. Am I busier than Paul was? I don’t think so. Wasn’t he always preaching, ministering, and serving in addition to working as a tentmaker? Paul was a busy man. My excuses are nothing but excuses. We do what is truly important to us.

As I have evaluated in my life how to make continually praying for my children a reality, three things have stood out to me. First, I must make this a prayer of my heart, acknowledging my need for help in this area and asking God to strengthen me for the task and to bring my children constantly to mind for prayer. I want Him to put on my heart what I should pray for my children as well. Second, I want to feel the urgency of the necessity of never-ceasing prayer for my children. Have you ever had a dear friend or loved one diagnosed with cancer? What happens to your prayer life in regard to that person? In the same way, as I truly see the importance of prayer for my children, it comes more naturally to my heart. Third, I should develop the discipline of prayer. I have discovered that my mind easily gravitates to simply thinking rather than to prayer. I have to make a conscious effort and decision to bring my thoughts around to prayer when I realize I am just thinking rather than praying.

After praying always for my children, the next challenge Paul gives me is to fill my prayers with thanksgiving, just as his prayers are filled with thankfulness for his spiritual children. Look back at the verses we read. How many of them have the word “thank” in them? Here are a few more.

“I thank my God always on your behalf, for the grace of God which is given you by Jesus Christ” (1 Corinthians 1:4).

“We are bound to thank God always for you, brethren . . .” (2 Thessalonians 1:3).

Think about what gratitude to the Lord for our children does as we pray for them. Thankfulness springs from a joyful heart. If we are continually thanking God for our children, it is hard to feel unhappy or angry with them. It prompts us to see our children in a positive light. It gives us hope for the areas of their failure and places their needs before the Lord. Spiritually, gratitude puts our thoughts where they ought to be—on the Lord rather than on anything negative about our children or ourselves. Being thankful for our children allows us to be in a place of rest and contentment concerning them rather than dissatisfaction.

Perhaps as we are challenged by Paul’s example of praying without ceasing for our children, our praying for them will be the most important step we can take in the turning of our hearts toward those children. It will be a true focus on them, and the best investment we can make in their lives. It may also be the most significant gift of love and sacrifice we could give to them. Will we be mothers who choose to pray without ceasing for our children? Will our prayers be filled with thankfulness for each of them?

The Importance of Daily Time with Jesus

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It was a normal Friday morning of cleaning and piano practice for the Maxwell family. Just before lunch, I sat down to do some computer work. Sarah called everyone to eat, and I jumped up with gusto. Between me and my meal lay the vacuum cleaner which I abruptly crashed into with my bare foot. Immediately I experienced that excruciating pain one has when they clobber a toe into an immobile object. In this case, though, the pain didn’t subside as quickly as normal because my little toe was indeed broken.

This mishap curtailed my ability to walk with Steve in the early mornings after our personal Bible time—a custom we have enjoyed for many years. I sorely missed the exercise my walk afforded me and the talks Steve and I have while walking. However, I gained a wonderful benefit from those extra minutes of being home each morning. I worked at making myself get up with Steve at our normal time, although the temptation was to stay in bed and sleep a bit more. By maintaining my usual schedule, I was able to spend what had been walking time for more Bible reading and prayer. Spending over an hour with the Lord each morning is something I only dream of because generally a half hour a day for my quiet time of Bible reading and prayer has been realistic and workable in my life. That extra time with the Lord each morning for six weeks was just what I needed.

It is not uncommon for a mom to come up to me after a workshop and want to discuss specific difficulties that she is dealing with in her life. After I listen to her problems, I try to make my first question: “Are you having daily, personal time to read your Bible and pray, knowing that is the key and most important starting point?” More often than not the answer will be that she isn’t spending time with the Lord and that she realizes this is what needs to change before anything else will.

I hear over and over again from moms that they struggle with getting up in the morning to spend time with the Lord. Usually there is a reason why she can’t awaken early enough to have Bible reading and prayer. It may be not going to bed at a reasonable hour the night before, a sick child up in the night, a nursing baby, or simply the enjoyment of staying in bed. While it is true that most of these reasons cost us sleep, we also have to make decisions about our use of time based upon our priorities. If we had an important doctor appointment after a late night, we would make ourselves get up so we wouldn’t miss the appointment.

Before Steve and I became serious about our daily, personal Bible reading and prayer time, we had to come to the point of seeing our need for and the value of this time. We would say we wanted to rise early enough to spend time with the Lord, but we were quick to let our many excuses for not getting up give us the freedom to stay in bed.

When I was in the years of pregnancy and nursing babies, I had scheduled a nap in the afternoon. This gave me the security of knowing that if I was really tired from getting up early in the morning, I had time set aside later to take a nap. With a newborn, I would sometimes change my Bible reading and prayer time to early afternoon, although it was not my preference nor did I want to leave it this way for long. Still, I could sleep in the morning and also rest knowing I would have time with the Lord, because it was scheduled for right after the children laid down for their afternoon naps. I believe it is best to have time with the Lord first thing in the morning, but when that isn’t happening, another time that works is better than not having the time at all.

“All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness: That the man of God may be perfect, throughly furnished unto all good works” (2 Timothy 3:16-17). Isn’t this our heart’s desire: that God would thoroughly equip us for every task He has called us to do? This verse tells us that God’s Word is the key to this equipping. It will teach and correct us. Yet, it is easy to say the right thing—that we want God’s grace to direct and help us through our days—but fail to do what we need to do to make it possible for Him.

Psalms 119 is a beautiful chapter showing us the value of Scripture to our daily lives. I challenge you to read through it several times. Let’s look at some of these verses to see how God’s Word meets the needs we are experiencing.

Do we struggle with sin? “Thy word have I hid in mine heart, that I might not sin against thee” (Psalms 119:11).

Do we need counsel on a difficult area of our lives? “Thy testimonies also are my delight and my counselors” (Psalms 119:24).

Am I afflicted in some way? “This is my comfort in my affliction: for thy word hath quickened me” (Psalms 119:50).

Do I want to be wise and make good decisions? “Teach me good judgment and knowledge: for I have believed thy commandments” (Psalms 119:66). “Thou through thy commandments hast made me wiser than mine enemies: for they are ever with me. I have more understanding than all my teachers: for thy testimonies are my meditation. I understand more than the ancients, because I keep thy precepts” (Psalms 119:98-100).

Do I need comforting? “Let, I pray thee, thy merciful kindness be for my comfort, according to thy word unto thy servant. Let thy tender mercies come unto me, that I may live: for thy law is my delight” (Psalms 119:76-77).

Do I need to know how to make it through a trial? “Unless thy law had been my delights, I should then have perished in mine affliction” (Psalms 119:92).

Do I need direction? “Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path” (Psalms 119:105).

Do I need rest and protection? “Thou art my hiding place and my shield: I hope in thy word. Depart from me, ye evildoers: for I will keep the commandments of my God” (Psalms 119:114-115).

I know what it is to be busy, homeschool, have a large family, be pregnant, be nursing a baby, have sick children, and have more to do than there seems available time. Yet I am convinced that there is nothing I could have done with that time I spent each day with the Lord Jesus in Bible reading and prayer that would have been any more beneficial to my life, my husband’s life, my children’s lives, or my homeschooling. I have a dear friend who has gotten up for years in the middle of the night to read her Bible and pray. It is the most consistent, uninterrupted time of day for her. Then she goes back to bed and to sleep. If Bible reading and prayer is truly important to us, we will find time for it and then be disciplined to keep it.

I am convinced that it is the heart cry of homeschooling moms to live in such a way that will honor and glorify the Lord Jesus Christ. Plus, we want to guide our children in the paths of righteousness as well. May I challenge each of us that the starting place for this—the place to begin dealing with depression, anger, laziness, impatience, fear, anxiety (I share more about these issues in Homeschooling with a Meek and Quiet Spirit), and every other need we have—is daily spending time with the Lord. It is likely that the busier we are—and the more we struggle with taking time to read our Bibles and pray—the needier we are for this time. May we each determine, with God’s help, that we will be committed to making Bible reading and prayer as high a priority as eating our meals.