Category Archives: Dad’s Corner

God’s Direction Through the Dad

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What are your goals for your family? Have you written them down? Are they your goals or the Lord’s goals? Without a rudder and compass, not many boats would ever reach the harbor. I think a reasonable analogy would be that our compass should be the Lord’s direction. A good example of this is found with Noah.

In Genesis 6:22, “Thus did Noah; according to all that God commanded him, so did he.” Now look at Genesis 7:5, “And Noah did according unto all that the LORD commanded him.” First, we see that Noah had to have a relationship with God to receive instruction from Him. Do you know the Lord Jesus as your Lord and Savior? The initial step is having Jesus as Savior and, unfortunately, many men never go beyond this point. The second step is for Christ to be our Lord. He must be our boss and commander. His precious blood has bought us, and we are His. That means we do what He tells us to. He will instruct us in how to lead our family.

God gave instruction prior to the flood on how Noah could save his family. God did not tell Noah’s family, but He told Noah what to do. Think about the absurdity of what God said to Noah, and then Noah had to tell his family. They were going to build a boat, and it was going to rain and drown everyone. Does your family love and respect you enough to follow your leadership even when they don’t understand? Noah had many years to prove himself to his family prior to this unique direction from the Lord. Dads, are we leading our family in ways of righteousness, as God would have us? “But Noah found grace in the eyes of the LORD” (Genesis 6:8). We can’t walk in the ways of the world and expect our family to follow us when, all of the sudden, we interject an occasional righteous direction.

In Genesis 8:13-14, we see that Noah waited for almost sixty days, from the time he saw dry ground, before he left the ark. They had been in the ark roughly ten months when they first saw the ground was dry, and it is incredible that he waited another two months. WHY?

It is the secret of Noah’s success, and it shall be the key to ours as well. Such a simple thing, really, and our success as parents depends on it. It isn’t a matter of how much money we have or how smart we are. The key is revealed in verses 15 and 16, “And God spake unto Noah, saying, Go forth of the ark. . . .”

After being cooped up, under less than optimum circumstances, Noah was waiting on God to tell him when to leave. I expect Noah’s family might have had many suggestions as to when the proper time was to leave! However, he waited on the Lord. Dads, that is exactly what we must do! We should get a word from the Lord for every aspect of raising our children. Dads are the rudders. There will be much pressure, from within and without the family, for the father to change course. The father must know what the heading is and stay true, or there are great possibilities for shipwreck.

Dads must be sure that what the family does is consistent with his goals for them, goals given by the Lord. If God has given you the goal of:

Serving–Do your children know what it is like to serve others? How are you demonstrating serving and training them to serve?

Working–Are they learning how to enjoy working, or do they only know how to be entertained? Must everything be fun, or are they learning some real skills? Are sports, friends, and activities the focus? If so, isn’t that teaching them that life must always be fun, and can’t we expect a generation of couch potatoes and thrill seekers? Was Jesus a “Man of Sorrows” because there was nothing fun to do, or because there were more important things to do?

Worship–Do they know how to worship, or must our children be sent away to Children’s Church? Often Children’s Church is just entertainment with a few Bible stories thrown in. Children aren’t expected to sit still and listen to God’s Word being preached. At what special age does preaching automatically become interesting?

We need to examine where God has called us to go and weed out those things that are distractions from the course. There is great joy in working, ministering, and serving together, and our family will be prepared to face life as God has intended.

Dad, the Spiritual Leader

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How comfortable are you with your role as the spiritual leader of your home? Is this something you willingly own as your responsibility? How do you view it compared to your calling to provide for the physical needs of your family?

We can be wonderful providers for our families and yet, after a full life, have each of our children end up in hell or as worldly, lukewarm Christians. That seems to put the issues into perspective, doesn’t it? Have we spiritually reproduced death and carnality, or vibrant offspring of the Lord Jesus?

I remember at one point in my life smugly thinking, “I’m doing what I should as the spiritual leader of my home.” We were homeschooling, the children were in Sunday School, and I was having bedtime devotions (a pretty shallow one, but it counted, didn’t it?) with the children. What else was there?

Think about Moses for a minute, and God’s calling him to lead His people. Moses kept telling the Lord he was not equipped to properly lead the Israelites. Even after God said He would enable Moses for this job, Moses still back-peddled. Finally, in Exodus 4:14-16, “And the anger of the LORD was kindled against Moses,” and God agreed to use Aaron. “And he shall be thy spokesman unto the people: and he shall be, even he shall be to thee instead of a mouth, and thou shalt be to him instead of God.”

I’m grieved by how few fathers really take the role of being the spiritual leader of their homes seriously. There are either excuses about capabilities and gifts or no real effort beyond going through the basics. God equips those He calls. We must believe that God will equip us to do the job He has given us. He gave Moses signs of his authority, and said Moses was to “be to him instead of God.” Isn’t that an incredible statement? Moses’ actions were to be a picture of God in the flesh.

Is it any wonder so many have poor concepts of God when their fathers were terrible examples? What an awesome responsibility we have as fathers. God intended that we dads help form the God image in the minds of our children. That is one reason the Lord’s Prayer begins, “Our Father which art in heaven. . . .”

We have no greater responsibility than, as far as we are enabled by the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, to demonstrate Christ to our families. Christ said if you have seen Me you have seen the Father. His purpose in coming to earth was to reveal the Father. Are we able to fully grasp the seriousness of this calling? Our desire needs to be to live as Christ in full view of our families. We must be crying out to the Lord on behalf of our families, dying to self daily, and if necessary, giving our life for them.

Moses was a wonderful picture of that as he cried out to the Lord for the Israelites. I was greatly challenged by Moses’ response to the Israelites making the golden calf while he was on the mountain. God was ready to kill them all and make Moses into a mighty nation. Yet what did Moses say? In Exodus 32:32 he said, “Yet now, if thou wilt forgive their sin–; and if not, blot me, I pray thee, out of thy book which thou hast written.”

I believe that is referring to the Book of Life where the names of the saved are recorded. I think Moses was demonstrating his willingness to go to hell if it meant the rest of the Israelites might live. Here we have the picture of Christ’s atonement for our sin made as an offering to the Lord. When that sank in, I was challenged to the depth of my heart. Moses was willing to make the ultimate sacrifice for those he was called to serve.

May we bring our families before the Lord constantly as Moses did in the Tent of Meeting. May our families see us going to the Lord in prayer as the Israelites saw Moses. May we take our calling as a serious matter of life and death.

God’s Warnings

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In Matthew 9:13, Jesus responded to the Pharisees’ question about His associating with tax collectors and sinners with, “But go ye and learn what that meaneth, I will have mercy, and not sacrifice. . . .” I believe this provides great insight into the way our Lord deals with us. I see in Scripture that He will orchestrate events in our lives to bring us to a point of repentance and asking for mercy.

Lot is probably an example of all of us at some point in our Christian walk. There has likely been a time when each of us has chosen some degree of compromise, or lack of obedience. I know I prefer to think that my sin is my sin and does not have an effect on my family. Obviously, that is a convenient and incorrect myth!

The reality is that my walk, or lack of it, with Christ has a definite impact on my family. There is no such thing as a private sin that does not have an effect in some way on those I’m called to shepherd. However, God in His grace will try to gently get our attention.

You’ve heard the naval expression “a shot over the bow.” In naval terms, a shot is fired in front of another vessel to warn them they had better change course, or stop for boarding. God works in much the same manner.

Lot’s “shot over the bow” was when God destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah. It was a sinful, wicked place, and he knew it. That is why he didn’t want the angels spending the night in the square. Lot was wrong in choosing to live there. Some might argue he was trying to win the city. However, if you pay attention to what the mob and his sons-in-law said to him, it is obvious he was not winning them to his God, but losing his family.

His compromise cost him his wife, when she longingly looked back. It almost cost him his daughters as he offered them to appease an angry mob. It did cost him his daughters’ virtue as they demonstrated later with their father in the mountains.

Notice that Lot learned something from his warning. He first wanted to go to Zoar, even though he was instructed to flee to the mountains. The angels knew his physical abilities and were not telling him to do something he was not capable of doing. However, for the same reasons he was living in Sodom, he wanted to go to Zoar. It is likely that after seeing the wickedness of the city, he realized he was at risk. He then chose to be obedient and go to the mountains.

God wants us to keep our families out of evil environments. From my observations, it is often the father who places the family at risk. Praise God that He doesn’t immediately chasten us when we disobey. Our Lord desires mercy, not sacrifice. However, to offer us mercy, we have to be repentant and seek His forgiveness.

Several years ago, I was convicted that I had said something unkind to a relative. The Lord was telling me to ask forgiveness, but I resisted. One day as Nathan and I were preparing to leave for work, I decided to let the car roll backwards out of the garage while Nathan went back into the house for something. Unfortunately, I did not see that the rear car door was fully open.

As you can imagine, our garage doors are not wide enough to accommodate a Honda Civic, with a door open, passing through without some degree of trauma. The car lurched to a stop, and I looked back to see the door bent backwards. UGH! Even though the furthest thing from my mind was needing to ask forgiveness of the relative, that was the thought that instantly filled my mind.

God has a way of warning and chastening us when He needs to. I believe there was not twenty-four hours’ passage of time before that relationship issue was dealt with. My gracious Lord had said it was time to take care of it!

My own father inadvertently exposed me to wicked things that have cost me greatly. Eventually, it cost him his family. God had sent him a “shot over the bow,” but he ignored it.

How about you? Is there some area of your life that is a compromise God is not pleased with? Is there something that God has warned you about that cries for your repentance and needs a change? If so, don’t delay and take the chance of grave consequences; repent of it today. Your family and the Lord will bless you for it.

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Men of Faith

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I delight in associating with and investing in men hungry to know and serve God. Sadly, men of God are quite rare these days. The church and families are in great want of men committed to following the Lord Jesus. So who were men of God in the Bible, and what were some of their qualities?

Moses, Elijah, Elisha, Daniel, Shadrach, Meshach, Abednego, prophets, and certainly the Apostles were all men of God, just to name a few. What qualities can we observe in their lives?

1. Men committed to obedience and holiness.

Even as a young man, when confronted with having to compromise his convictions, we are told, “But Daniel purposed in his heart that he would not defile himself with the portion of the king’s meat, nor with the wine which he drank. . .” (Daniel 1:8). (I believe Daniel would have faced death, if necessary, to remain obedient to God’s direction for his life.) He could have said, “I’m in another country now and everyone else is . . . ,” or, “I’m being commanded by my authority to . . . ,” or, “I sure don’t want to make trouble.” He could have justified it by any number of “reasons.” However, as fathers we are to be committed to following through on what God shows us is His will for our family.

2. Men of courage who are committed to prayer.

“Now when Daniel knew that the writing was signed, he went into his house; and his windows being open in his chamber toward Jerusalem, he kneeled upon his knees three times a day, and prayed, and gave thanks before his God, as he did aforetime” (Daniel 6:10). Even when Daniel knew he would face the lion’s den, he went to the Lord in prayer.

3. Men of faith ready to face death.

“If it be so, our God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace, and he will deliver us out of thine hand, O king. But if not, be it known unto thee, O king, that we will not serve thy gods, nor worship the golden image which thou hast set up” (Daniel 3:17-18). Even when the three faced the furnace, they knew God could rescue them. They were willing to die if God chose not to deliver them. YEAH! Can you imagine what our families would be like if we men had this same faith and dedication? Are we willing to die daily to ourselves for our families? Our Lord Jesus set the example.

4. Men who speak only the truth.

“And he said unto him, Behold now, there is in this city a man of God, and he is an honourable man; all that he saith cometh surely to pass. . .” (1 Samuel 9:6).

“And the woman said to Elijah, Now by this I know that thou art a man of God, and that the word of the LORD in thy mouth is truth” (1 Kings 17:24). Every word out of our mouth must be true.

5. A man of God results in God being praised.

“And he returned to the man of God, he and all his company, and came, and stood before him: and he said, Behold, now I know that there is no God in all the earth, but in Israel: now therefore, I pray thee, take a blessing of thy servant” (2 Kings 5:15).

6. Men who are able to see God’s protection.

“And when the servant of the man of God was risen early, and gone forth, behold, a host compassed the city both with horses and chariots. And his servants said unto him, Alas, my master! how shall we do? And he answered, Fear not: for they that be with us are more than they that be with them” (2 Kings 6:15-16).

7. Men of God are ever improving their skill and knowledge of the Bible.

“All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness: That the man of God may be perfect, throughly furnished unto all good works” (2 Timothy 3:16-17). If this verse is true, and I believe it is, we must study God’s Word to know how to live and confirm God’s direction for our family. I once knew a man who said he was praying about divorcing his faithful wife. If he had known God’s Word, he would have known that wasn’t an option for him.

There is so much more that could be said, but Jesus Christ is the perfect example. “Dear Father, help us to be like Jesus.”

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Directed by God

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Are there any men whom you look up to and respect? What qualities about other men do you admire? Is it because they have great wealth, talents, or intelligence? Someone I respect immensely is Jeremiah the prophet. I just love reading that book because I see a man for whom God had a mission. Jeremiah was willing to be obedient, no matter what the cost. He was clearly not thrilled about it at times, but he was obedient.

In Jeremiah 27:2-7 the prophet describes the Lord’s instructions: “Thus saith the LORD to me; Make thee bonds and yokes, and put them upon thy neck, And send them to the king of Edom, and to the king of Moab, and to the king of the Ammonites, and to the king of Tyrus, and to the king of Zidon, by the hand of the messengers which come to Jerusalem unto Zedekiah king of Judah; And command them to say unto their masters, Thus saith the LORD of hosts, the God of Israel; Thus shall ye say unto your masters; I have made the earth, the man and the beast that are upon the ground, by my great power and by my outstretched arm, and have given it unto whom it seemed meet unto me. And now have I given all these lands into the hand of Nebuchadnezzar the king of Babylon, my servant; and the beasts of the field have I given him also to serve him. And all nations shall serve him, and his son, and his son’s son, until the very time of his land come: and then many nations and great kings shall serve themselves of him.”

First, consider how foolish Jeremiah was going to look wearing this yoke around. Can you imagine how his “friends” and neighbors would laugh at him? “There goes that crazy Jeremiah. Ha, ha, ha!” No doubt, he would have looked somewhat strange!

Next, think about Jeremiah sending messages to the king of Judah and neighboring kings. These were not just Christmas cards to his friends. Here is a “nobody” telling kings that they were going to be conquered and that (verses 8-11) they should not resist, but rather serve Nebuchadnezzar. Zedekiah, Judah’s king, could have been sufficiently angered to have replaced Jeremiah’s head with a basket. Now, not only do his “friends” think he is crazy, but he risks his life by possibly angering many in authority.

So, what does that have to do with Christian fathers of homeschooling children? In Jeremiah 1, we see God told Jeremiah clearly that He had a purpose for him. Jeremiah was to obey and not be fearful. Fathers, do we see ourselves as directed by God to lead our families? Are we fully committed to obeying God’s Word and setting an example for our families, even if it is not popular with them, our friends, or our neighbors? Do we cave in when they begin to apply pressure? Maybe you have a child who wants to be in school with “friends.” Will you be strong and do what is best for the child?

We see in this passage that God uses plain “ole” people like you and me. What is important is that we are obedient to His Word. He has clearly called us to train our children. That involves character, knowledge of the Bible and the Lord Jesus, skills necessary to earn a livelihood, and information about health and government. This is our responsibility, and it is not easily handed off to another. Are we committed to doing what is best for our children versus what everyone else does? It is so easy for us to be consumed with earning a living that we don’t own this responsibility ourselves. May God give us grace to be men of God, dedicated to knowing Him and serving Him, by being the husbands and fathers He intends us to be.

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Dad, Where Is Your Heart?

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In school, I preferred fill-in-the-blank questions to essay questions. I think that might be true for most of us. Consider for a minute a special fill-in-the-blank that could save your children from abandoning the faith. Are you game?

What if our children were to fill in the following statements about us?

_____________________ is most important to my father.

My father talks most about ________________________.

I don’t know about you, but I find these rather heavy. I believe that if my children answered them candidly, I might get a picture of who I really am. Unfortunately, I may not want to know the answers!

In Judges 6:13, the Lord is speaking with Gideon. The Lord has just told Gideon he is a mighty warrior, and He is with him in spite of the fact that Gideon is acting in a very cowardly way. Then we read, “And Gideon said unto him, Oh my Lord, if the LORD be with us, why then is all this befallen us? and where be all his miracles which our fathers told us of, saying, Did not the LORD bring us up from Egypt? but now the LORD hath forsaken us, and delivered us into the hands of the Midianites.” Now what does this verse have to do with the fill-in-the-blank statements above? I think there are several points worth considering.

If the fathers had been living God-fearing lives, Israel would not have been in the mess they were. God was chastening the nation because the fathers were not living as God had called them to. “And the children of Israel did evil in the sight of the LORD: and the LORD delivered them into the hand of Midian seven years” (Judges 6:1). The fathers were not telling the children that all of this oppression was a result of the fathers’ sin. Instead, they seemed to blame the Lord for having abandoned them, as if He didn’t love them anymore. Actually, the truth was the Lord did love them and wanted to punish them so they would cry out and return to Him. Dads, are we experiencing hardship or chastening that is a result of our lack of devotion and love of our Lord?

The fathers were actually telling their children about the wonders the Lord had performed. Many dads have felt they were doing all they needed to do by telling their children about the Lord. Maybe they were even going so far as to read to them from a Bible picture storybook at bedtime. Even though that is good, it isn’t enough. You see, our deeds speak for us. During the day, we will automatically talk about what really is important to us, and we will live out our values. These fathers were telling their children about what God used to do. However, all children need to see fathers living their lives dedicated to serving a living, loving God. Our children should have fathers who love the Lord so much that they can’t help but talk to their children about the tender mercies and goodness of the Lord Jesus. Our children will grow up like we really are, not who we tell them they should become.

Instead of the Lord receiving the blame for difficult circumstances, He should be praised for His goodness when He is disciplining us or leading us through times of trial. Do we only love Him when times are good? Do we want to teach our children to love us only when they think we are being kind to them?

I pray this, “Oh, Father, may we demonstrate our love for You constantly to our children. May we be quick to confess our failures and not blame the consequences of our sin on You. May our children see their father praising You, Lord, and being quick to pray to You. May You be the first and most frequent topic on our lips. May my children know by my actions that You are the One I love more than anyone or anything.”

Dwelling on Imperfections?

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Sit back, close your eyes, and daydream for a minute. I know you can’t read with your eyes closed! However, think for a moment about your wife. What thoughts are going through your mind? No one else can truly know what you are thinking, but let’s take a few minutes and be completely honest.

Here are the pictures that come to my mind. I see a wife with a child on each side and one sprawled across her lap, as she reads stories to them each afternoon. I see her on a “search and destroy mission” as she crisscrosses the living room, picking up a few remaining toys and socks after the children are in bed. I see her lying down with her back flat for a few minutes to ease the pain so she can get back up and keep going. I see a wife who delights to give her husband a backrub every night when we are in bed on time. The pictures whirl by as God brings to mind the gift He has given me in my wife.

Now what emotions do we experience as a result of the pictures? Peace? Love? Tenderness? Joy? Gratefulness? Are there any negative feelings? There can be, as most wives are not perfect. How do we deal with this? Do we let ourselves ever dwell on something negative about our spouse? The answer should be a resounding, NO!!!!!!!

About six months ago, I did just that. There was a trivial imperfection in my sweet wife, and I allowed myself to dwell on it. Whenever I saw her, I would take up that thought. I began to feel sorry for myself and be judgmental of her. I knew it was wrong, but I continued to do it anyway. Soon she knew something was wrong and asked me about it. I told her it was my problem, and she could pray for me. Sharing the details with her would have been hurtful and not helped in any way. Her prayers were what I needed.

By God’s timing, our church’s men’s meeting came, and I was eager to go. During a time of sharing, I confessed to the men that my heart was wrong toward Teri, and I needed prayer. I was allowing wrong thoughts, but had not been able to break out of it. As is the custom during these fellowship times, the men gathered around me and prayed for me. The result–God totally freed me from my thoughts, and I had wonderful peace on the way home that night. When caught in a trap, if we are unable to break loose, we ask for help.

If we aren’t willing to ask for help, our marriage and family security are in grave danger. “Perfect” marriages have been broken due to that very weakness in the husband (or wife, for that matter). Yes, it is a weakness. Had I been stronger, I would have chosen not to think about a slight fault in my wife, but instead thought of all her wonderful qualities. Think about it. What good could ever be accomplished by dwelling on some fault in a spouse? Hebrews 12:15 warns us that a root of bitterness grows up into evil. “Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, and thereby many be defiled.” If we allow even a small amount of bitterness to be in our mind, it will always grow. It can be over nothing (mine was). However, it soon won’t be small, and we will begin to look at everything our spouse does in a very negative light. It will kill a marriage.

So what is the point? Let us be on guard to not fall into the trap that has shipwrecked many a marriage. We made a vow before God to love and cherish our wives, not to dwell on any shortcomings. We should be crying out to God to work on our own failures. We don’t want to be a stumbling block for our wives and give them opportunity to dwell on our faults. Ugh, now that is a scary thought!

Living with No Regrets

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What if tonight, in a dream, God tells you He is giving you one more year to live? How would that affect the way you interact with your family? How would you spend your time? Is there anything you would do differently? It is my desire that I would live each day as if it were my last.

It seems one area of deathbed remorse is sorrow over things a person wishes they had done differently. I have teenage memories of a great desire to live my life with no regrets. I’m sure that watching my parents divorce after twenty years of marriage might have had something to do with that. Can you imagine facing death without any major regrets? I know we can’t change what has already happened, but we can attempt to make restitution for the past and live from now on with renewed purpose.

What if each of us were to live the next year as if it was our last? How would we live it? I know some non-Christians who would try to pack all of the pleasure they could into the time they had left. Hopefully, none of us would do that, but it can be the desire of the flesh. I know a teenager who had cancer, and his parents were letting him fly many places so he could experience as much as possible before he died. Is that the meaning of life, to see as much as possible and have wonderful experiences? If that were true, we would not hear of so many people with great wealth being miserable, and eventually taking their life physically, or by drugs and alcohol.

Frankly, I know quite a few dads who live their lives seeking all the pleasure and recreation they can. The highlight of their week is the football game, or some other sports event on TV. You can quickly tell what is most important to someone by what they will most readily talk about. When compared to the father’s pleasure, children are often regarded no higher than pets; they’re okay to have around as long as they don’t get in the way of the dad’s other interests. I love the attitude of a homeschooling family who has moved on. One night after a meeting, while the mom was patiently putting what seemed like the child’s seventeenth layer of winter dress on, she exclaimed with deep sincerity, “I feel so unworthy of the honor of serving these children!”

I’m not saying our life is to revolve around our children. However, we do need to die to our own selfish pleasures and center our life on the Lord Jesus Christ. Instead of the law, which the following verse refers to, let us substitute Jesus Christ, Who is the fulfillment of the law, and see how we need to live. “And thou shalt teach Jesus diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of Jesus when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up” (Deuteronomy 6:7 modified).

We share with our children what is important to us. If sports are important, then they will be important to our children. They will likely become couch potatoes and neglectors of their families. If pleasure and recreation take prominence, our children will likely be slothful and gluttons. If we are “religious” only on Sunday morning, live for ourselves, and don’t demonstrate our love and excitement for Jesus, then our children will likely consider us hypocrites and reject Christ.

Do we look at our children as inconveniences or as blessed opportunities? Are we thinking that they are our heritage, and we only have a very limited amount of time to leave an impression on them? We are leaving an impression on them now, but what kind of impression is it? Do we like what we see in our children’s lives? They resemble us. Today is the first day of the rest of our lives, however long or short that may be. Let us live each day as if it were our last. NO REGRETS!

Standing for What Is Right

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It is hard to believe I’m actually awake! After twenty years of going away to work, I now have my office in our home. Often I will hear a quiet knocking on the door. I open it, and a little one will come in. After a hug and updating me on the latest news, the child is gone.

Years ago, God put the desire in my heart to work, vocationally, out of our home, but I saw no further direction. So we waited and waited. We would pray, “Lord, we believe You are giving us this desire. We will wait until You show us clearly what to do.” Then, all of a sudden three years ago, we were given the leading to launch a business. What was strange was that I was working full time. I sure didn’t have time to do any real work in a business we would start. There was barely time to put together the paperwork to set it up.

After our oldest son graduated from high school, we were able to have him contract out through our new business. God had us put our business in place prior to our needing it. It was the perfect vehicle for his contracting. However, we felt that wasn’t going to be the only purpose for the business. I still wanted to be home working full time for the business, but I clearly believed God was saying “not now.”

On the twenty-first of January 1997, God led me to take a stand at my job that we thought might cost me that job. Unfortunately, we were not prepared to be without an income, but we knew God would provide if that was His will. To our total amazement, the potential of losing the job dragged on all year. One day I would think I was going to be fired, and the next it would quiet down!

It was such a wonderful time of learning to rest and trust in my Lord Jesus’ care. I can’t remember one night of losing sleep over it. Don’t get me wrong. It wasn’t that I didn’t care, or that I had my head in the clouds. There was just peace about it and thankfulness that Christ was dealing with the situation.

The next thing we knew, they were no longer talking about firing me. Now there was talk of laying me off. The funny thing was that this was great news since there would be some financial consideration with a layoff as opposed to being fired. We had been praying, “Lord, just make it clear to us that You really want me to leave.” What could be clearer than to have your employer lay you off? Right?

Then my employer decided to give me a choice between another job and a layoff. This was not according to our plan at all! God was supposed to make it absolutely clear by not giving us any room for a decision. This new twist brought some real earnestness to our prayers. Finally, God gave Teri and me full peace that I was to leave and come home.

I stand in awe of how the Lord has directed over the last year. It would be very easy to laugh as I look up the road ahead. I have told some that I feel like I’m “out of the boat” right now. I find my competitors and other challenges to be the “waves.” However, as long as I keep my eyes on the Lord Jesus, I have real joy and peace.

I know some of you may face similar challenges. My encouragement to you is: don’t be concerned with your perceived consequences to a decision, but look only to the Lord for His direction. That is the only thing that matters and will enable you to be calm in the midst of a storm. If I did not have the clear assurance I’m here because God wants me here, I would be troubled indeed. Our prayer has been and will continue to be, “Lord, what do You want us to do that will bring You the most glory?”

Faults

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It is quite interesting how additional time with the family, such as may happen around holiday time, can reveal some rough edges. I love having more time with the children, but when I do I find I become more aware of particular areas of need in each family member’s life. This year it was one person’s faults, in particular. Unfortunately, once that happens, it can almost be a distraction as you zero in on him.

The person I was most aware of, unfortunately, was me. Don’t you just hate it when it is your problem? I would much rather it was someone else’s problem and not mine. The question always before me is, have I demonstrated the character of Christ in my home as God has called me to? “And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord” (Ephesians 6:4).

Picture in your mind the Lord Jesus having a family. I see Him being patient and gentle, while training and maintaining order in the home. I don’t think He would raise His voice when correcting, even if there was repeated disobedience. He would not have a “tone” in His voice. Oh, how I yearn to be like Christ!

Have you ever noticed that when a person deeply loves someone or something, certain things happen? It is very easy to illustrate. Look at the average person who “loves” the Kansas City Chiefs football team. They dress in red and know everything about the team. They talk about the Chiefs and even long to be “with” them at the next game.

Honestly, as I think back over the last several weeks, I feel that other things have crowded out my love of the Lord. The symptoms are there. I haven’t been as careful to have quality devotions as before. My Scripture memorization has slipped, and my focus on Christ has lessened. I’m fooling myself if I think there won’t be an impact to my ability to be Christ-like in the home. So what do I do?

The third chapter of Colossians is the perfect prescription for my ailments, especially verse 12. “Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering.” Wow! Just to apply that one verse alone would be incredible. Unfortunately, even if I could obediently do all that, my heart is the problem. However, that is what Christ does; He changes my heart. It is Christ dwelling in me that enables this verse to become alive and active in my life. I must love my Lord with all my heart and clothe myself as He would (the armor of God in Ephesians 6). I should talk about Jesus more, and not only long to be with Him, but choose to spend more time with Him each day.

The whole section in Colossians from verse 12 to 17 is so good. It is the “tune-up” I need for my walk with my Lord. How about you? Are you demonstrating Christ in your home? If not, you will be discouraged trying to do it in your own strength. It just doesn’t work! Jesus Christ changes lives. He is the One Who enables us to be the dads our families need us to be.

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Posted in: Dad's Corner