After becoming successful with chores in our home when we had our eight children and before writing a resource on that topic, we did a survey of a large number of Christian, homeschooling moms. One statistic we garnered from that survey was that about 75% of those women did not feel prepared for their roles as wives, mothers, and homemakers while the other 25% were prepared. Those women said that the presence or absence of chore responsibility growing up made the difference. 

You are preparing your children to become mature, responsible adults so I want to encourage you to invest heavily in a chore system in your home and teaching your children how to do those chores. You can’t tell a child to do something and then expect that he will know what and how to do it. They need to have you demonstrate the chore, talking through it as you go and then letting them try it while you are watching. 

I wonder if practice is one of the major missing pieces that cause many to fail at their chore system. Recently we heard a reading specialist mention in a talk that dyslexic children can learn to read, but it takes repetition and practice and more repetition and practice – not just for a week, but for months and years.

We want to teach our children their chores and then think they will be off and running with them. That formula leads to disappointment and frustration for Mom, and that was certainly part of my failure with chores and my children in the beginning. How much better it is when we teach the chore, put it on the schedule, and practice the chore with the child for several days, until it is clear the child knows what to do and how to do it.

The next major stumbling block with a chore system is expecting that the chores will be done and done the way we want them done. I once heard someone say: “Don’t expect what you don’t inspect.” It takes time to daily inspect chores that are assigned to children. That means not only do the children have chores in their schedules but mom needs a time in her schedule to inspect them. This puts accountability in the chore system. 

If a child isn’t doing his chores or isn’t doing them well, Mom will decide if she needs to go back to teaching the job. Remember the dyslexic reader – repetition. Perhaps more practice with Mom is what will turn it around. On the other hand, it might be that we have moved into a character issue that must be addressed. It could be distractibility, lack of self-discipline, laziness, not paying attention to detail, hurrying, or many others. These are important to work through with your child too. Remember, we are headed for mature, responsible adults – step by step. 

Here’s an encouraging story a teenager’s mom shared with me.

“One of my children, who wishes to remain nameless, just said this – I promise, it is an exact quote . . . ‘I’m glad I have to do chores!’

So there you go. It only took 10 years of reinforcement, toil, sweat, tears etc. (on my part, I mean. 🙂 For those of you just starting in the trenches – don’t give up!  It pays major dividends!  Definitely not easy – what an understatement – but totally worth it!” Sandra

May I encourage you to work on chore system, not just setting it up but teaching, practicing, and inspecting the chores? “It is good for a man that he bear the yoke in his youth” (Lamentations 3:17). While it may seem daunting, it is worth it, and it is never to late to start. 

If you need any help with a chore system, I suggest you get Managers of Their Chores. It has facilitated so many families in a successful chore system in their home and the positive outcomes that are desired from it.

Contentment – how is it going for you? If you are struggling with it, do you know where to begin? Paul and James are wonderful teachers of contentment, so let’s turn to what they have to say.

“And lest I should be exalted above measure through the abundance of the revelations, there was given to me a thorn in the flesh, the messenger of Satan to buffet me, lest I should be exalted above measure. For this thing I besought the Lord thrice, that it might depart from me. And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ’s sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong” (2 Corinthians 12:7-10).

Paul had a “thorn in the flesh.” He asked the Lord three times to be relieved from his difficulty. However, the Lord’s answer was “no.” God had a purpose and was going to use this as a demonstration of His grace and strength in Paul’s life. What was Paul’s response and ultimately his secret to contentment? He chose to take “pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ’s sake: for when I am weak, then I am strong.”

For me, this kind of response goes against my natural reactions to hard circumstances. What I feel like doing is grumbling, complaining, being irritated and unhappy, feeling sorry for myself, and figuring out my own solution.

James learned the same lessons about contentment. “My brethren, count it all joy when ye fall into divers temptations; Knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience. But let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing” (James 1:2-4). The word “count” means “to consider, deem, account, think” (Strong’s Greek & Hebrew Dictionary). This is an act of the will. It is a decision I make as to how I will think about my trials. James didn’t tell me to simply accept my trouble, to endure my difficulties, or to grit my teeth until it was past. No, he said to “count is all joy.” JOY! Doesn’t that sound like an impossible reaction to hardship? It is when I am relying on myself, but remember Paul told us when we are weak, Christ is strong.

Our natural reactions put self in the limelight. How does this affect my comfort level? Is this to my liking? Can I see anything positive in it? Scripture tells us that Jesus Christ is to be the center and object of our thoughts and therefore, as always, the focus. When this is true, then we can rest. Resting is the place of faith and trust in a sovereign God. It is acceptance that He knows what is best for our lives. We count it as joy. When we receive trials with this attitude, then we are content. My joy is not in what is happening but rather in my relationship with Jesus Christ.

Seeing that Scripture teaches us that contentment is important and knowing this from personal experience as well, may we seek contentment. May we make the choice to “count it all joy” and to take “pleasures in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ’s sake: for when I am weak, then I am strong.”

Teri Maxwell

August means school starting for most homeschool families. After a slower pace of summer, the thought of adding in school hours can be daunting for the homeschool mom. You might be a mom with all younger children who are not yet school age, but you are drowning in all that you have to do. I know the secret that will make it possible for you to keep up and regain your joyful spirit. You need a schedule for your time and your children’s time.

A schedule forces you to critically evaluate your time and prioritize it. When you put your life into a schedule, it is definable and quantifiable. God gave us each 24 hours in a day, and those are the boundaries with which we work. Your priorities are no longer missed because your day ended. Each one has its rightful place in the schedule. 

A schedule makes what you do on a daily basis habitual. Once a habit is formed, you don’t think about it any more. It just happens. No more trying to keep everything that has to be accomplished in your mind, hoping you don’t forget, and then getting sidetracked by what isn’t a priority at all.

A schedule brings maximum productivity into your home. You don’t waste time doing what doesn’t matter, and you don’t waste time trying to decide what to do next. You are utilizing every moment in the most productive way according to its priority, that you and the Lord have determined. That might mean taking an afternoon nap if you are up with a baby or child in the night. It could be reading out loud to your children or playing games with them because that is important to you.

A schedule frees you from battles with your children to get them to do what they are supposed to do. When you consistently follow the schedule, their days become habitual as well, and they know what to do and when to do it.

A schedule allows you to do activities you didn’t think you had time to do. It makes you so productive that it is likely you will keep up with what you weren’t keeping up with before your schedule and have time for what you had only hoped for in the past.

A schedule improves your health because it assures adequate sleep, exercise, and healthy eating. Bedtime and wake up time are the foundations on which your whole day is built. A schedule defines and stabilizes them. Without enough sleep, you drag through the day, are emotionally short with the children, and put your health at risk. Lack of exercise and poor nutrition have the same effects.

A schedule grows your relationship with Jesus because you daily have time with Him. “As newborn babes, desire the sincere milk of the word, that ye may grow thereby” (1 Peter 2:2). 

This verse encourages us on physical exercise but even more on our time with the Lord. “For bodily exercise profiteth little: but godliness is profitable unto all things, having promise of the life that now is, and of that which is to come” (1 Timothy 4:8).

I lived that discouraged, overwhelmed, there’s-never-enough-time, stressed life. I didn’t like it, and I doubt you do either. I know firsthand the differences and benefits a schedule brings, and I want those for you, your family, and your home. Please don’t excuse the idea away by saying you couldn’t do it or that it isn’t for you. I have seen so many moms move from despair to joy, from frustration to peace, and from stressed to contentment. “Redeeming the time, because the days are evil” (Ephesians 5:16). Are you?

If you need help with scheduling, Managers of Their Homes is your proven tool.

Summer is soon to arrive, and that often means a change of pace for us, especially homeschool moms. This is the time to begin preparing for those summer months if you want to utilize them productively. Homeschool moms often look forward to summer and all they can accomplish that isn’t possible during the school year. However, it is common for them to come to school startup disappointed that their hopes were not fulfilled over the summer. Be purposeful now so that you have the summer you want to have.

Seek the Lord

“A man’s heart deviseth his way: but the LORD directeth his steps” (Proverbs 16:9). How beautiful it is to have thoughts about what you want to do over the summer, submitting them to the Lord for His direction. Perhaps that is well done in the morning hours before the children are up, with a cup of coffee or tea right after your Bible time. No matter when you do it, being quiet before the Lord and asking Him to direct your steps and your children’s for the summer is critical. 

This verse could be key as you begin: “But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you” (Matthew 6:33). Where does the Lord come into your summer plans. How will you and your children seek Him and His righteousness in a planned way? Maybe you will personally take more time for your Bible reading. You could set your preschoolers up for audio Bible time or work with a teen in how to have a meaningful time in the Word. What about a theme verse for the summer to memorize as a family and bring into as many aspects of daily life as possible?

List It

As you prayerfully consider the summer, write things down. Perhaps you are going to do some school. Maybe you want to do organizing and decluttering. Are there cleaning projects to be tackled? What about learning a skill with your children or teaching them one yourself? Summer is a great time to revise chore assignments and teach new ones. What about serving opportunities with your children – making freezer meals to share when they are needed, babysitting for a young mommy, or visiting elderly friends?

Discuss your thoughts and lists with your husband. He might have his own ideas to add, and he could encourage you away from something that you have on your list. Then keep your list before the Lord in prayer.

Plan It

Next what is on your list can be organized and separated into groups leaving spaces between to write or congregating the ones that are related. Pray and ask God to help you with specifics for implementation. What will it take for this particular thing to happen? That’s why I like working on the computer. All the listing, moving ideas around, and adding details to them is easily achieved there. 

Finally, you work on a schedule to give time for what you are going to do. Again, move forward with prayer. You want the power of your God working with you in the achievements of the summer. Without getting what you want to do on the daily schedule, it probably won’t happen or at least not very often. Some things only happen once, like a zoo day. They won’t be on the schedule as such. Those are the days, you actually drop the schedule. 

But most of your days can have a rhythm the schedule directs that is Christ-led because you sought Him for what goes on it and when it should happen.

The Joy

I think as you seek the Lord and His righteousness for your summer, you will have joy in the planning and preparation, joy through your summer days, and joy at the end when you consider the summer behind you. That comes from your being purposeful about your summer. This is the time to do that!

Teri

I believe Christian homeschool moms have a deep desire for their children to become adults who are born again, lovers of God’s Word, and followers of our Lord. “It is written, Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceedeth out of the mouth of God” (Matthew 4:4). “As newborn babes, desire the sincere milk of the word, that ye may grow thereby” (1 Peter 2:2). What can you do, as a mom, to facilitate this?

Model

What do your children see that you love? How much do you love the Word compared to other things? Your children’s love for the Word will likely emulate your love for the Word. What are you modeling for them? Are you reading it daily? Do you talk about it and tell them what you read, what you learned about God, what you learned about what He wants from you, and how excited you are about it?

I wish I had done better with this when my children were growing up. These are precious opportunities to set all our minds on things above, but it is easy to let the busyness of the day push those thoughts away. Then our conversation gravitates to the mundane of daily life. Be vigilant to make discussion of the Word your first priority.

They may not see you having your Bible time early in the morning when they are still asleep, but when you share with them from it, they know. 

Time

You can make it a normal, habitual part of your children’s days to read their Bibles by creating a schedule where that happens each day. When the schedule sets that time aside, and you follow the schedule, each day your children will have personal Bible reading. 

Before breakfast is an excellent time for Bible reading because then what was read can be the topic for breakfast-time discussions.

Right now the family of one of our sons has all the children (6 that are ages 3-10) do their Bible time together in the living room right before breakfast but after getting dressed. The reading children have their Bibles on their laps. There is an audio Bible playing that the readers follow along with in their Bibles, while the pre-readers listen. Even though they are all in one location, each child is having his personal Bible time. There is no adult instruction going on. This does have the added benefit of accountability. 

Provision

For children to have personal, daily Bible time, they need to have their own Bibles with a font easy for them to read. You can provide them pens and highlighters. Sometimes that is a additional motivation in Bible reading when they can make some notes and highlight things that stood out to them. Pre-readers can participate by having a set up for an audio Bible time.

It is important to instruct your children in how to have their Bible time. You might suggest specific books of the Bible to read. Then you could encourage them to look for what they learn about God in the chapter and what God says for them to do or not do. Those notes could go well in little notebooks that could be brought to the breakfast table to facilitate the biblical, spiritual discussions.

Time in the Word is our daily spiritual bread and the nourishment for our souls—helping us know and discern God’s will (Rom. 12:2), filling us with the fruit of the Spirit (Gal. 5:22-23), giving us all things that pertain to life and godliness (2 Peter 1:3). “For the word of God is quick, and powerful, and sharper than any twoedged sword, piercing even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart” (Hebrews 4:12). Who wouldn’t want that? Are you helping your children toward it?

For more in-depth information about children’s Bible time, here is a Mom’s Corner from several years ago about it: https://articles.titus2.com/childrens-personal-bible-time/

This is a Mom’s Corner on preschoolers having Bible time: https://articles.titus2.com/how-to-do-bible-time-for-preschoolers/